Oh yeah, well I'm only 26, and I totally grew up appreciating the shit out of cave paintings and reruns of Mister Ed.

Wait, is Jenna supposed to be Amy Poehler or something?

"The lawless chaos of naughty words." Still laughing about that one.

Your dad is Jackie Gleason?

I would have preferred "James Cameron knows now why you cry, but it is something he can never do."

I thought Kung Fu Panda was the sequel to Beverly Hills Ninja.

I thought it would be a crazy wild-eyed scientist or some kid. Just based on what Future Biff told me.

And, how come we don't have hate crime laws to protect racists? Where are all the homophobe pride parades?

Yes. I'm really getting sick of reading that calling assholes on their bigotry is just as bad as bigotry itself. That's just lazy sophism, but apparently it works on a lot of people.

It doesn't matter so much that he's shit actor Kirk Cameron. He's a high profile piece of shit who should be denounced as a symbol of bigotry.

Yeah, like Dan Savage says. Ask for the first names of a couple of them, what their hobbies are, etc. It'd at least be fun to force him to expound on his lie on the spot.

I'm sure he has lots and lots of gay friends, and they're probably totally cool with him using their friendship as a tool against them. Likewise, I have dozens of Christians who support me when I say, Kirk Cameron is a stupid piece of shit.

I'm totally not! It's you! Take responsibility for your decisions. If you want Taco Bell, just say so. No need to blame the Ouija board.

It probably happened in a movie you starred in, but your memory has been distorted so much that you now think it actually happened to you. No, wait, that's Ronald Reagan. You may actually be right about the chocolate Fruit Roll Ups

I don't know, "…a tried-and-true premise that’s lingered since the early days of Greek drama, when Aeschylus first wrote Agamemnon And His Sassy New Secretary, Diane" just jumped to 48%. It's going to be a close race.

I don't know, maybe people confuse jokes that show that the writers are sexist with jokes that are about sexism.

Yeah, but weird, dangerous things happen when you put vowels together like that.

And more importantly, those poor, poor women!

Yeah, and people are gonna think we're talking about Mega Man when we say "No, I mean Project X 87!"

Only because you refuse to think about it at all. You're forcing me to do all the thinking for both of us, and it's reprehensible. You're history's greatest monster.