Cream Burger is definitely the best $2 burger I've ever had in Houston.

Yeah. I don't know who's more petty and pathetic, the commentator who hires a guy to "troll" pop culture sites by injecting politics, being really condescending, and refusing to engage anyone, or the guy who is actually willing to do that job.

It's tough because conservatism is by definition the entrenched power structure, and making fun of the other side just seems like punching down, and most of the time when I see someone try to make a "conservative" joke like that they just rely on stereotypes, or, like, berating poor people for their moral unfitness to…

It doesn't matter which brown people we blow up, what matters is that it's good for my ego

Screw that, I want this thing to last exactly until the point O'Reilly gets so enraged he beats up an audience member.

I was thinking he didn't want an arrow pointing at his baby dick all the time.

Tucker Carlson sent his lickspittle here to troll us until he got banned. That's the kind of guy Tucker Carlson is. There's a picture of him in the dictionary next to "twerp."

I'd rather have a can of Miller Lite behind the desk for 30 minutes a night than Dennis Miller.

Look, I'll save you some trouble: Whale sperm does not make a good cake icing. Just trust me.

Dennis Miller reacted to 9/11 like an eight-year-old who just saw his Dad get beaten up. "I don't care what Daddy has to do, Daddy has to show he's the biggest and strongest again no matter what!"

The anger is so crucial. Why do you think Strom Thurmond and Jesse Helms lived so long? It sure wasn't their tobacco-lovin' lifestyles.

There's a Prolapsr? I've been trying to get all my dates on 'Nus!

"You need a credit card number? Okay, just one second…"

One of my Facebook friends shared this the other day. I don't know yet what I think of it, but it was really thought-provoking:

Most of my friends are good people, but I think they'd by and large find the idea of a cop who's shocked other cops are on the take a bit naive.

Acting awards should come with a free ham.

I was in college at the time. Street cost of Vicodin was probably $5.

Holy shit, that sounds good. My favorite BBQ right now is Killen's in Pearland, though I only made the drive once. When I want to stay in the loop, I'll head to Gatlin's. I will mention 4 Corners to my fellow barbecue aficionados and see if they know it / want to try it.

I haven't, but I think I've been by there. My favorites so far, I think, are Hubcap Grill and Lankford Grocery (which is my usual spot since I live not too far away). Also love Guy's Meat Market's smoked burgers at lunch, just because they're so unique.

Especially in 2002. Those new DEA regulations didn't kick in until October of last year.