"fucking chicks with 80's hair" is one thing, but "being able to get your penis completely into those newly-hatched birds before they split while you also happen to be sporting a feathered mullet" is something else entirely

"fat people dancing" is one thing, but "the super fun epileptic break dance strobe light country time jamboree and blindfolded monster truck collision extravaganza" is something else entirely

"Gold Case" is one thing, but "a show where people compose and perform musical numbers using instruments constructed from their own anatomy" is something else entirely

"a 72 AMC gremlin" is one thing, but "a super-sweet twin-turbo narwhal-bot with heated seats" is something else entirely

"the reality of Bitch Hunting" is one thing, but "that movie where Matt Damon asked the guy on the other side of the window whether he liked apples" is something else entirely

"screwing charlie sheen in the dark" is one thing, but "the only way to earn my allowance while growing up in the old folks' home" is something else entirely

"an island full of rotten milf that has turned into cottage cheese to be eaten by small girls who are scared from their tuffets by hairy-legged guys" is one thing, but "one thing that is contrasted against something else entirely, where one of the things may or may not be ridiculous" is something else entirely

"hey, kids, we're going for a drive into john long lake" is one thing, but "no, that's not my baby, it's 19-day-old pizza in the trunk" is something else entirely

"do the tick tock ya don't stop" is one thing, but "piling in the backseat"is something else entirely

"transcription" is one thing, but "using screwdrivers to plant microchips in mouse brains to force them to synesthetically transmogrify human speech into automatically occurring subtitles" is something else entirely

"old fat ladies who used to be pretty"is one thing, but "me wearing a sophia loren skin-suit" is something else entirely

"believing that nicolas cage is trying to do a role" is one thing, but "not taking it seriously when someone says: 'my dog thinks he's people'" is something else entirely

"a supposed comedy" is one thing, but "corky thatcher crying on stilts in a clown costume with a spell of uncontrollable farts as he tries desperately to stay upright" is something else entirely

"being a not-so-good actor" is one thing, but "nepotism" is something else entirely

"saving money" is one thing, but "the last drop of dilpodocus earwax in my beard" is something else entirely

"mediterranean families" are one thing, but "the nurse, the priest, the baby, and my mother - who are all dead, pumped full of tranquilizers, and in my basement"
is something else entirely

"you eyes" are one thing, but "what i did to your family with this pair of pliers" is something else entirely

"killing me won't bring back your honey" is one thing, but "it's a 'cross WALK, not a cross PARK'" is something else entirely

"reading later" is one thing, but "being stabbed in the eyes two minutes before my wedding" is something else entirely

"expecting there to be something called 'nicolas cage'" is one thing, but "the reasonable expectation that a thing called 'nicolas cage' will be a good addition to a cast" is something else entirely