'Godfather Rambo'

WUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! WAAAAHHHHHH!!!!! WWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Samwise Ganja got Gandalf hooked on the halfling's leaf, which clearly slowed his mind. It's the gateway drug, you know.

Richard Lewis has this nurse…

Yeah, what was with the dog? Was it real? Did the scientists clone it to intensify the dude's hallucinations? Or was that the gay dog? I guess I'm not a smart person. I have a hard time believing it was the gay dog because most of the gay dogs I've met are miniature yippy-yappy things. Pomeranians.

Haven't you heard the news of the Falklands? There is a war on.

I don't HAVE "friends!"

See how incoherent they are? They go from calling the critics retarded social outcasts who never got laid in high school (and apparently take their bitter vengeance out on obsessive fanboys—yeah, it doesn't make sense to me either) to being pompous over-educated wannabe preppies who are just too prissy to "enjoy"…

I never said cartoons were childish dribble. What I'm saying is that they are specifically conceived, written, and marketed for children. As are Nerf guns. And the fucking Hunger Games, for fuck's sake. I don't think it's unreasonable to suggest that the current generation of full-grown American thirty-somethings who…

Silly Rabbit. You could say the same thing about Nerf guns.

…For children.

What is it with fucking AV Club nerds who believe as a MATTER OF UNDISPUTED TRUTH that the Nolan films are VASTLY IMPORTANT and their unquestioned appreciation as the greatest films EVER is so GRAVELY SERIOUS that a dozen of you guys will jump all over anyone who DARES criticize them and accuse the critic of being a…

Bwa-hahahahahaha!!! The BATLASH begins!!! It looks like the smarter commenters have apparently completed their evolution on grown-up film criticism, doesn't it Mr. Nolan? Bwa-hahahahahaha!!!

The thing that often gets overlooked about him is that he was the last governor who actually balanced a budget. He also produced a surplus and sent everyone a check for $500. T-Paw left us with a $2 billion deficit.

Umm…it's a cartoon.

"Where you goin' with that hoe there, boy?"
"Joss whedon de garden, Boss."

Unfortunately, you are still a grown ass man who loves the guy who did Buffy the Vampire Slayer. This is why we don't win wars.

You mean The Brokeback, out in Jackson Hole? No, that's still open.

BO-RING. Wake me up when Johnson N. Johnson dies.

Diablo Cody's "Crazy Faux Teen," starring Megan Faux.