I don't remember ever having to die onstage, but we did once have to toast (with big sturdy lowball glasses) and then drop the glasses in surprise. But on opening night, we were a little too amped up, because when we toasted, we smashed the glasses together and shattered them. We all then had to ad lib new actions…

[checks Facebook] There's nothing wrong with wanting fast-pa—[clicks 3 minute YouTube clip, gets bored at 0:52]— That is, tastes can change and… [watches Vine of escaped llama]…

The fact that you call it that tells me you're not ready for NBC comedy.

This whole interview was outstanding, but I'm going to make a point to remember "always die in a comfortable position".

I thought we were playing Othello!

Don't kick that gong around, it's full of — — See, what did I just tell you? I'll get the be-bop mop.

[touches fedora brim] Here's lookin' at you, Genius.

Whoa-ho. Whoa-ho-ho-Joey-Blow-ho-ho.

Done, and done!

Hoping we can make the All-Marlowe Thread a new comment feature.

You'd better stop surfing yourself and get back to work, or you'll be out of a job, Internet!

Dr. Rumak, could you give us your impression of the Airplane series?

Do you have any idea how expensive it is to have someone crawl around underneath a female yak, waiting for her extra milk to drip out?

*That's* Miss Yvonne?! I would never have put that together on my own.

[absently rubs long-healed 32-year old bruise on bicep]

Don't know why people even Tri-Star-ting such threads.

I DON'T KNOWWWWW.

I usually identify as binomial, but since we're all friends here, it's honestly more accurate to call me polynomial.

Plus then the racist Oscar voters would accept the "I can't breathe" t-shirts.

Perfect timing — I just uploaded that video yesterday!