Louise turned her mom into Lysa Arryn? Damn, even if you've just been grounded for the afternoon, that is cold.

The best part about Holt's haiku is that, owing to the form's syllabic requirements, the first line of his wedding poem would be "Marriage is a con."

Between the Boyle family butt-fives and the dance Tina wrote into Bob's Burgers, there was a lot of butt-on-butt action on Fox this evening.

I couldn't live in the Lego universe- imagine how difficult it would be walking down stairs with no knees and no ability to look down!

Aw, do I? But I've almost got a total military victory in V! The military AI is SO TERRIBLE!

Well, it's more tactful than releasing a statement saying "come on people, he's so obviously gay that I'd feel more threatened if a teddy bear were feeling me up."

I suddenly have an urge to play Civilization V later today… RIP Mr. Nimoy.

so uh Todd what is your position on reproductive rights for women

Same thing minus the charm.

Yes- with all those silly 3D glasses on, it takes everyone a few more seconds to realize my pants are down and I'm yanking off in the theatre. And those few seconds are critical.

He's equally shocked every single time he gets elected.

Not only did Gayle never age, we never saw Ron age (though we never got a very far look into the future with him either).

Reading between the dialogue lines, it seems like Schmidt's fear of spiders comes from Fat Schmidt jerking off into a pie circa 1999, falling asleep from the effort/post-coital bliss, with the pie in front of him and his nether regions unscrubbed, and waking up to find his apple-pastry-coated genitals aswarm with…

I think it's pretty much confirmed that the New Girl writers/directors put in jokes that are designed to turn into gifs.

I'm calling it: Nick spent so much of the episode behind the stove because Jake Johnson is pregnant, and it's getting difficult to hide the signs with wardrobe changes. I see what you're trying to do with those loose-fitting flannels, Jake, and it's not working!

Holy shit, did New Girl get Joe Keenan to write a script? That whole "popcorn machine" conversation between Nick and Jess was a perfect farcical-misunderstanding. And yes, it wasn't remotely realistic given what we know about these characters*, but it obeyed the Prime Farce Law: always be at least a little more funny…

Scene 1: Old man wakes up, and looks at camera.
Old Man: "STOP FOLLOWING ME AROUND WITH THAT CAMERA!"
*Old man throws dentures at camera*

That's a 7-minute montage at most.

Do The Right Thing is amazing in how much there isn't a clear villain of the piece. Buggin' Out has a point, even if he has an annoying-as-shit way of making it. Turturro's character is an asshole, but you get the sense that he's as angry with his father as he is with the neighborhood. The closest thing is the cops,…

I have a feeling Beck and Kanye would get along. After all, they both want to defy the logic of all sexx laws.