Most Spanish speakers love to give shit to Argentinians and Chileños about not speaking the language properly.  I can believe it.

The Jolly Green Giant
Has a stable full of hos
Except instead of ladies
He pimps out potatoes.

@avclub-d009e8b6ce98ad61a7b7a69cd1ad10d9:disqus I believe that's known as "Steve Martin Disease."

Literary maximalism not really your thing?  Then allow me to appropriate the more minimalist leanings of William Carlos Williams:

Well, hold on a minute.  Did she specify which hair?

Fuck you!

This headline really should have been "HOMELAND STEERS INTO SKID, GIANT CAN OF WORMS"

My favorite moment in Woody Allen's filmography is that one scene where he has that line with a philosopher's name in it, and then everyone in the audience laughs very loudly and looks around nervously.

The blockbusters are weak?  YOU'RE weak.

Look on the bright side, when Paul Feig directs an all-female post-apocalyptic comedy five years from now, we can all hail it as groundbreaking.

This just makes me wonder what happened to the animated version of Achewood that Chris Onstad was supposedly trying to get made.

Sorry, me from two years ago doesn't hang out on this site anymore.  If you want to argue with him, you'll have to create a space-time paradox that makes time travel possible.  I'm not exactly sure how you go about doing this, but I would suggest that you first try to jump up your own ass.

It was definitely Alana Bloom, right?

And now, A Tale of Two Cities for parrots:

The Beethoven sketch always makes me laugh, probably because it contains the largest John Cleese Shouting Quotient of all the sketches in the episode.  Cleese playing Beethoven as a henpecked husband, tempestuous but ultimately powerless to keep his wife from running the vacuum when he's trying to work, is great, as…

What about the Watutsis?  They were tall!

Best part of the Terry Jones striptease:  And the nominees are:

It's almost certainly not.  Big game hunting is traditionally a much more English thing (give or take a Theodore Roosevelt), an outgrowth of English colonialist tendencies that put the English aristocracy (who are stereotypically very keen on hunting) into contact with a large number of exotic animals they had not…

My favorite bit from that sketch was the revelation that one of the top programs in idiocy was at the University of East Anglia, not for any great reason, but mostly just because I did an exchange semester there, and it's funny to see a school you attended held up as a great facilitator of bringing more idiots into…

Not to mention Cleese's blackface cricket player, and Idle's alcoholic cricket announcer remembering a similar situation to the couch substitution "when we played the darkies in 9 BC."