What if it means giving you a splintery beejer?

I'm pretty sure Rocky rapes Adrian to kick off that franchise.

I don't even follow this Tops in Pops shit, and I've at least heard of True Blue.

Faust and Furries

To increase scope, they should just have an on-screen graphic counting how many off-screen innocent bystanders have died. Or a character played by Xzibit who pops in every so often to yell "OH SHIT DWOG, 400 PEOPLES KILLED!"

I kept a running animal count at the Greensboro show.. 23 1/2 if you count the gazelle being eaten by the cheetah. That Conway fellow sure loves his panthers, sharks, dobermans, falcons, etc.

LIEK DIS IF U CRYED 

It's not a Festivus miracle!

..to deliver a special sermon on the sanctity of deliciousness..

I know how 2 be simple, everyone. Just write a petition, get
everyone's signature, including our clients, march down to Florida, and
shove it up your butt!

Eh, needs more James Blunt.

..and this week's "Anybody know what's going on here?" Another hit!

Mine's "The Implication"

My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is *not* a porn star!

What's actually gong on with that Asian family? #covertracism

♫ I, I FOLLOW!!! I FOLLOW YOU, FOLLOW YOU!!! ♫

What we've got here is a groundswell of Maya Rudolph hotness advocates, arising solely from how much she smushed her boobs together in Idiocracy.

I don't know why they call 'em fingers, I never seem 'em fing.

Robin Ventura

Yeesh
Aunt Flo's visit looks like it was an extended one.