Hal was kind of a Ringer too. "I will NOT raise a child with…BLOSSOM BLOOD in my home!"
Whisper "Blossom Blood" to yourself. I swear it's hard to stop once you get going. Blossom Blood! Blossom Blood! Blossom Blood! Blossom Blood! Blossom Blood!

I love how Riverdale parents are so twisted up that they can't even accept an invitation to an innocuous diner without sensing an ulterior motive. "Are you here to gloat? You are, aren't you?"

Because Archie is a manipulative control freak and he can't stand it when his toys don't obey the rules or dare act as though they have a will and life of their own.

Well, on the one hand your baby's paternal grandparents are ginger vampires who feed on maple sap. But on the other hand, your parents are crazed control freaks, and your mom is most definitely an unsalted nut.

Yeah. Where was he hiding those guns??

Seconded! Riverdale didn't have enough crazy for me this week. I was way more into the preview for next week that had Cheryl making out with Archie.

Not a hard trick. X-men comics are awful.

It's okay, Michael. With faith and love, you're going to beat this thing! I mean, you still have insurance, right?

Malvo: Walk away.

"I have come…to RECLAIM ROME…for my people!"

I know, it was awesome. When he got locked up, the Patriots were really hurting for a tight-end. They were wrecked for the first six weeks of the season, it was wonderful! Still can't believe they got into the play-offs that year.

There is no shame in reveling in your utter disdain for the Wheel of Time, whilst also obsessively loving it. It's the cringiest series ever written, while also being THE BEST EVER.

Yeah, but Brady's so handsome, and successful, and apparently a very nice person. Seriously, fuck that guy. He's not better than me!

Heh, Marrow and Maggot. You can point at one and say "That's got to be the shittiest mutant power ever," and someone else can point at the other and say "nuhuh.

Heh, I've been a Psylocke hater for years. I think Uncanny X-force was what flipped me on her. I find all her samurai/ninja whatever she is this week posturing really annoying. When she goes off on one of her stupid warrior monologues, I find myself myself wondering if her current writers remember that she's a body…

The uncanny run that ended with him losing a one-on-one match with Betsy "yellowface" Braddock was a deal-breaker for me. It's like a human being losing a typing contest to a pig.

I used to spend a lot of time defending Scott Lobdell, because I enjoyed Generation X so much. Once I realized that what I really enjoyed about that comic was Chris Bachalo's artwork, I became a lot snottier. Operation Zero Tolerance, Onslaught, most of the Age of apocalypse, and the replacement X-men arc were some…

Graaah, Faile. I pretend her name is pronounced fail and chuckle whenever I'm stuck reading one of her POV chapters.

GRIIIIIIIIIIFIIIIITH!!!

Science fiction: "Cypher" from the Matrix. That lousy weasel. That cowardly prick. Completely understandable motivations, but maaaaan.