Seven Samurai: best movie ever, or best THING ever?

Already Packed For Mars
Yet here I am, still waiting for Deep Impact to come true. We've got the black president already, where the fuck's the asteroid?

Call me crazy
but I've always had a thing for Talia Shire. Is there a word for a situation where you are neutral about a person but like them mainly because you want to bang their mom, because that perfectly encapsulates how I feel towards Jason Schwartzman. I'm sure the Germans have a word for that; they seem to have…

What if they punch a zebra? No? Okay, how about if somebody gives a donkey a purple nurple?

Celine?

No, no, no. Sarah Jessica Parker is the horse-faced cunt; Julia Roberts simply has Joker teeth.

A Margaret Thatcher biopic starring Ray Winstone.

I "like" to "quote" "things", too, if you "know" what I "mean".

Bugs is a dickhead, Now whacking it to Daffy? That I could understand.

The fact that my first cinematic crush was on Christina Ricci as Wednesday Addams really explains a lot about my romantic choices, in hindsight.

I wonder if they'll ever remake Kind Hearts and Coronets, possibly directed by some modern day comedy hack like Adam Shankman or Shawn Levy. All they'd have to do is cast Steve Carell, Steve Martin or, if he feels like doing the multiple character thing again, Eddie Murphy, and BAM, instant greenlit remake. Insert a…

For once, I have to agree: Bad Santa was NOT the misanthropic comedy classic everyone says it is, at least in my opinion. Not to say it wasn't funny; I got a few chuckles out of Billy Bob, Tony Cox and Bernie Mac, but on the whole it seemed like everyone was just trying too hard. The biggest redeeming facets were John…

Luke Wilson
Remember when he used to be good?

But…but…
…where will I get to see a group of rich assholes acting like complete fools? Now I'm gonna have to go back to watching C-SPAN.

When I was in high school, the big bands were Korn and Limp Bizkit. It was a dark time.

as*

I bought and read "The Metamorphosis" at a voracious 12-year-old reader. Not because I had any interest in the human condition or anything, but because somehow or another I'd heard there was a giant fucking BUG-MAN in it! I know, I know, he's not specifically a bug, but it was a big selling point for me.

I saw "Pulp Fiction"
in the theater with my mother when I was 11 years old. That was pretty cool, but I don't recall that heralding my entry into adulthood, really (although it was quite nice being the only kid in school who knew what was going on behind that door in the pawn shop).

[on being told he's being arrested for disturbing the peace after getting thrown out of the bad guy's HQ]

Stupid California with their discrimination. Thank God I live in an enlightened state like Pennsylvania, where tolerance is the law of the land.