I was put off at first by the lack of plot in the first 30 minutes or so. However, once it starts moving, it's a great and thoughtful ride. 
Also, Viagra? Still funny.

A Wah guitar solo towards the end is just what the song needs

SLAYER!

WOOOO
Summer of '69!!!!

Dear AVClub,
You've lost that loving feeling

You almost did a man's job, son. But you failed miserably along the way.

or are we dancer?

May you be…THUNDERSTRUCK! (and hit by a Rock n Roll Train)

Satch…meh.
Yngwie Malmsteen, now that's a true guitar player. Plus, he loves doughnuts.

I want to see Jeff Hanneman as the villain. He's a professor, gets bitten by the same spider, but due to Peter's STD-ridden blood develops necrotizing fasciitis. He will throw chunks of meat at Peter.

I wish he'd do Xenu.

11) Highways.

Seasons in the FAIL Abyss

50k for a verse, no album out?

Speaking of assholes, I was a roadie for Metallica on the "Speed of Sound" tour.

did you "accidentally" get straight-A's?

Dark Shadows Revival
I haven't seen the original, but I thought the early 90s reboot was a fantastic show. Loved the production values, music and the incredibly sexy performance by Ben Cross.
They even got Barbara Steele!
Plus, I remember seeing Adrian Paul in a supporting role the same time I was watching Highlander.…

I wonder if he chopped some scientist's ear to get him to speak the truth. While playing "Stuck in the Middle".

Dad,
You're a regular Brad Garrett

I left a turd in the shower. On my FIRST attempt