Done and done!

It's called cocaine.

I think we can all agree that the potential for this show is… really, really, big.

It's pronounced Wiener-Slave.

He also specifically mentions following Sigourney Weaver into a bathroom one time, which is pretty much as creepy stalky rapey as you can get.

You know what they say about a guy with big shoes?

Because this show should actually be called "Class Privilege." Both Cam and Jay spent at least $100, probably closer to $200, on their last-minute costumes.

The best line of the night was Haley explaining how she responds to people who call her vain. It was something like, "shut up, you ugly troll, why am I even talking to you?"

H3A and Neighbors are a perfect example of what we should expect on a weekly basis from Modern Family, something between good enough and extraordinary. H3A is the kind of episode that hits all the right notes, with one story that's very funny (Dunphys), one that's fine for what it is (Jay/Gloria), and one that is…

To be fair, New York is a pile of garbage, and you all know it.

Now that my testicles have descended, I can't wait for some serious dry humping.

I think that Martha Stewart came up with the phrase "nosh pit" when she was eleven years-old and designed her entire career trajectory around the idea of one day using that phrase in a work-relevant context.

I'm going to be launching an all-female @disqus_jeTusCb3OY:disqus account soon.

Except can it just be the Winston character from New Girl? That would make me inordinately happy.

It ended at the end of the first Hobbit movie. At least, for me it did.

At least that character has a point, beyond just following Annalise around. I would rather hate her than wonder why she's even there at all.

There was an extra who was sitting next to Laurel, and his facial expression made me think that he was tempted to do just that. Very disappointing that he didn't.

The no liquid in the cup thing really bugged me about this week's episode of Modern Family.

How many emmys can they give to Viola Davis for her performance this season? Four? Twelve?

Weber gets too much shit for the lyrics to his musicals, considering that he isn't a lyricist. People need to hate Tim Rice more, like I do. Especially for the garbage Jesus Christ Superstar lyrics, which are garbage.