I told the doctor that, but they gave me a Valtrex prescription, and I'm better now.

I'm glad nobody at work heard me laugh while reading that last sentence.

That sounds like the book I would want to read immediately and then regret.

The key during these events is to listen closely. Supposedly a guy trying to bid on Jennifer Lawrence's sports bra ended up paying $575 for Steve Lawrence's sports bra.

My guess is the man will insist on Kermit's book being called It's Not Easy Being Green.

@avclub-e3f5ab7f02122f95b801e13e2c586d6a:disqus It appears not, although he was a producer at San Francisco's CBS affiliate in the '70s. (His name is Alan Frank, and it appears that he has retired.)

I used to live in southeast Michigan, and I remember reading that the affiliate's general manager hated the idea of network affiliation (for example, he ran a station in Florida and switched it from CBS to independent). Peculiar.

I think her version may be second only to Krusty the Clown's for me.

I actually sold my soul years ago for some ice cream. It was pretty good, I guess.

Pharr, Texas is a fun place name to say aloud and quickly.

And now, my most shameful admission yet: I saw Andy Dick on last week's episode of 2 Broke Girls playing a puppeteer who acted like his puppets were real. It may well have been the worst episode of anything I have ever seen in my life. I am worse for having seen it.

I just got the new Mad About Oscar issue. I personally liked "Ar-gone" and "Stinkin'," but what tickled my fancy the most was "Silly Line-readings Playbook." That, and the fold-in.

Reading that in a child's exuberant voice made my day significantly better.

I'm waiting for its inevitable spin-off, The Toucher.

“Will I ever realize my full potential, or is it it a harsh reality I refuse to face that this is my full potential?”

This was just great. Probably my favorite Valentine's Day episode this year of the shows I regularly watch.

Driving out to the airport and screaming at birds, same as every year.

Well, I hope he doesn't blackmail me over that certain…misdeed I…committed while listening to…Celine Dion. Geez, I need to get some better committin' music.

He's a chicken, I tell you! A giant chicken!

A Mr. Grady Wilson would like to let the commentariat know that the goopily goop he received this morning was, indeed, good. That is all.