Well, I don't know about ALL of them, FLAUBERT — some of them seem like they might have a hard-on for doing their own stunts. I'm sure they could sign some kind of idiotic 'waiver' to take care of the insurance costs. I recall Danny Trejo mentioning (in an A. V. Club interview) that Stallone or some other…

I bet the dick would have some kind of garish tattoo on it . . . Something like, "mama-jamma'" or a snake-skin pattern.

"Peg." I've never heard that before. It ain't no "plook," but it's okay, I guess.

Hey, you guys remember how bad she was in 'Mr. and Mrs. Smith' and 'Girl Interrupted' and 'The Bone Collector'? ESPECIALLY in 'The Bone Collector?'

No, no, no, no — I just enjoy tiny little slices of victory; which soon collapse under the weight of understandable human error.

I'm aroused by it . . .

Does that mean the Predator used 8th Grade geometry to find 'Dutch?'

"Sabotage" was the beginning of the end.

Well, well, well . . .
My first case of being censored by the A.V. club.

Holy fucker — I forgot about POGS. Hey, was there anything good about POGS? Maybe whipping those heavy metal ones at fancy cars?

"From M. Knight Syamalan . . . Somehow."

@BATMAN: Nice Reference.

Okay, the twist is, whichever character is a lady, see, she's pregnant with the Devil. Then, near the end, the whole crock of well-stewed shit turns into a gore-fest when the devil tears out of the woman, eats the afterbirth and grows real fast into Will Ferrell painted red with little devil horns.

I don't think Kurt Russell has "moved on . . . " he was just never cool enough to stand shirtless and oiled with the rest of his contemporaries. Plus he never escaped his genre-jumping — which is a good thing. Stallone has dropped the same corner or his bottom lip since Rocky and Bruce Willis is still bald and squinty…

"SAW 3D"

You know . . .
. . . Mel's one o' them "Christians," right; and they believe in eternal life-after-death for the "saved" or whatever? Well, shouldn't he just kill himself now — it would be the perfect ending to cap off all this ridiculous melodrama and screaming, and heavy breathing; and death threats. Then his…

"12 Angry Predators"

Give Uwe the helm and abandon ship . . . Is there a SAW video game yet? If there is, we're already 90% of the way there.

Quite true. The face was a HUGE payoff when I first saw it. I was blown away — I thought it was the coolest fucking alien I had ever seen. James Cameron mentions "mandibles" to Stan Winston and, VOILA' — awesome monster.

Out of some sort of self-inflicted obligation, I did not see "Avatar." PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE tell me there was ACTUALLY something in that movie called "Unobtanium."