God bless America.

I think I still may have taken this over the Kelly Clarkson performance I had to watch during the real inauguration,

Also, since Conservatism involves a lot of reverence to God and country, the list of "sacred cows" they can mock is pretty small. They end up making fun of political correctness, which leads to discomforting jokes like, well, "Haha, look at the people being different than me!"

Yeah, I think they are occasionally guilty of making a false equivalency (maybe the "Film Actors Guild" isn't quite as bad as, you know, invading Iraq) but I like that they are non only good about consistently mocking both sides of an issue, but also apparently having just as much loathing for the worst tendencies of…

Well, one thing is for sure: conservative satire can never be funny.

I once toyed with the idea of creating a gimmick account here called "Self-Conscious Dennis Miller," and I would post awful Dennis Miller jokes, then get nervous no one gets my obscure reference, and hastily explain the punchline.

Wait, what are Mitchell's actual politics? I only know him from Peep Show.

http://www.theonion.com/art…

And it featured a strangely restrained Tim Curry.

"Looks like the old cocksucker finally bought the farm."

Well, I felt like the thesis of "You're Getting Old" was "everything is crap including our stuff."

Stupid sex tape! [hits laptop] Be more sexy!

Happy Birthday!

No McTeague (either from the novel or the famous silent film adaptation Greed)?

What's sad is that, even though it would seem more logical to make a movie based on Calvin Candie's slave plantation than to "adapt" the Hasbro game Candy Land into a live action film, the latter idea is the one that's actually happening.

My favorite description of the game's rules is from the Colbert Report: "Monopoly is supposed to be a grueling, nine hour process that Dad always wins because his bedtime is latest."

Essentially, except you want to get 9 instead of 21, and an Ace is one but 10 Jack Queen and King are all worth zero. If your two card total exceeds 9, you subtract ten from it. If the two cards you are dealt equal 0-4, you must draw another; if they equal 5 you can stay or draw; 6 or 7 you must say, and if they equal…

Liked for the fact that ToddVanDerWoof talks like Chico Marx.

I don't know where else to post this, so here goes. Someone showed me this picture of Tarantino at the Django Unchained premiere and… it's just hilarious. I can't fully explain why, other than the fact that in it he looks like the lovechild of Frankenstein's monster and a retarded bird. Take a look, please:

Can I talk about a card game here?