The part with a stable government and plenty of money to blow on civic expenditures. Er…

I can't read. Can somebody please summarize the above thread using illustrations?

Actually, I don't watch TV.

[survives by watching Oxygen all day]

Youtube comments implore me to image how nice it would be if I gouged my own eyes out.

What? You think Americans would ever use something that came from France? (Hides Statue of Liberty and the collected works of Rousseau)

Are you completely sure Greedo's face hasn't been changed to some CGI abomination in one of the latest DVD releases?

Prove to me that it can't cure cancer.

I went to buy materials last night to make me a Stinger because I was really craving one, but stupid shitty Safeway doesn't stock creme de menthe. The one I went to is right next to a big private college, so I guess they needed all the shelf space to stock douchey drink mixers.

Ah yes, I love that scene. It's the best of all geometry-based put downs.

What happened to all those false promises corporate America made to us as children?

My mother-in-law watches Bravo, on average, about 8 hours a day. That is not an exaggeration.

"Why would you ever have to use a Mac?"

Smooth jazz fills me with indescribable ennui.

And it's toxic to the ALIENS.

"The moment a bullshit statement is tweeted it becomes true."

Horn: "Hey J.J., you've had years of experience dealing with nerd rage. How do I get Star Wars fans to shut up?"
Abrams: "Just keep saying 'screenplay'."
Horn: "How many times?"
Abrams: "Four."

Well, despite our differences, at least we can agree that all branch Paul Thomas Andersonians are going straight to hell.

Is your church reformed Wes Andersonian? Because mine is orthodox Wes Andersonian, and we hold that no film after Life Aquatic reflects the true spirit of Anderson, and that they who reject the doctrine as such will not receive the True Grace of Discerning White People.

Steve Ballmer on meth: He's not exactly subtle, but he gets the job done.