Oh man, I am entirely stoked on finally paying something for this masterpiece. I have a copy of Cave Story on every electronic device I own that will run it.

I had kinda the same thing, except it was realizing that there were now porn actresses younger than myself.

The only thing that has ever made me feel old is the knowledge that The Simpsons has now been bad for at least as long as it was good.

Thirded. The Woo movie had some extremely badass action that totally redeemed the boring love interest bits. I think the Abrams installment was the weak link.

Review Preview Text
"Is there a movie behind this internet meme, or is it the next Snakes on a Plane?"

Don't just stand there, I said come in!
GET OUT OF HERE STALKER

The Onion A.V. Club
You guys can become independent when you stop linking to the Onion at the top of every page and writing articles like this. Until then, when I refer to your site in public or with friends, it's gonna be "The Onion A.V. Club."

@RagingBear: Hm, looking back I guess it does read like that in context. What I meant was that Tasha's use of the word nihilistic ignored the heavy role that personal choice played in the film, which I thought was sorta self-evident, but then I didn't really mention that at all.

Eh, SS2 isn't cool now, and it's not like I was in on the ground floor here (I played it for the first time like 2 years ago, long after it was released). I just hate to see a fantastic game not get its due. And as good as the Bioshock games are, I think it is more sophisticated and haunting than either.

Now that I mention what?

Fair enough, I just find it strange that their main complaint about this game is a lack of originality, when it's not as if that was a quality the first one had in abundance.

Oh boy. It's the guy who wanted to start an internet fight with me over the definition of the word "nihilism." What a fucking treat. (http://www.avclub.com/artic…

Fffuuuuuuck, I didn't even hit post twice and it double-posted. Anyway, replace "Bioshock" with SS2 in this review, "underwater" with outer space, and "Bioshock 2" with Bioshock, and it reads as a perfectly serviceable review of the first game. It's already been pretty well established that Irrational/2K is selling us…

More of the Same?
Oh good. The A.V. Club recognized that this game is derivative of it's predecessor. Of course, when Bioshock jacked all of System Shock 2's tricks lock stock and barrel, it was named game of the year. But then, no one's played that because it doesn't have current-gen graffix.

More of the Same?
Oh good. The A.V. Club recognized that this game is derivative of it's predecessor. Of course, when Bioshock jacked all of System Shock 2's tricks lock stock and barrel, it was named game of the year. But then, no one's played that because it doesn't have current-gen graffix.

Origin Stories
Does this mean we're going to have to watch Peter get bitten by a spider and have his uncle shot and learn lessons about responsibility all over again? Origin stories are such a waste of time when it comes to characters that have been ingrained into the public consciousness. I wish more writers would…

Fuck, I've read this sentence at least ten times trying to make sense of it. Is Nathan dating a student? And is she teaching a Juggalo? I haven't even read the rest of the article because this sentence is making my head hurt so much.

What happened to Clay Davis Caruso?

Drag Me To Hell
I think Tasha needs some help understanding some things. The ending is not "pointlessly nihilistic," it's incredibly fulfilling. The film is called "Drag Me To Hell." If somebody didn't get dragged to hell, I sure as fuck would want a refund.

Er yeah, because AV Club users were the only ones to watch this movie and find that line comically out of place.