His lyrics are pretty coherent, that's a weird complaint.

First rapper turned actor??
Somebody's never seen Disorderlies.

It started with Aladdin. The Genie as played by Robin Williams. It worked in that movie, but the wisecracking reference-prone sidekick flourished after that (Eddie Murphy in Mulan predates Eddie Murphy in Shrek) especially in non-Disney animation. And then Shrek came along and made almost every character The Genie,…

Some people like soap operas. There aren't many (any?) soap operas squarely aimed at African Americans or even substantially featuring them, and no major network is going to pick any up, so Perry brings them to the live stage and to movie theaters. Nobody who already has no interest in soap operas really has any…

The answer: it didn't.

To address your first point, it's a movie review, not a trailer review.

In which case you should be executed for treason.

Cuz that's what we hip-hop heads prefer to be called.

By people would you happen to mean hip-hop heads?

I'm not suggesting it falls into the first half of that false dichotomy either, by the way. It's a cheap, hackneyed technique to discredit fans and elevate the reviewer, and obscure the subjectivity inherent in criticism. It turns an individual opinion into Moses on the Mount (the mention of sacred cows above is apt).…

Goonies belongs to the latter camp.
No it doesn't. It's a better movie than you are a human being.

There was a Gung Ho series already.

The latter. It's like your hippy grandma wrote the script.

Sullivan's Travels
It died in Pittsburgh.

Nobody on earth starts a sentence that way.

You don't need the following line
"She runs the gamut from A to A." Your joke works better without explanation.

Why bar Forgetting Sarah Marshall? Just to make your point work? Spartan got a good review, but before AVC started grading.

Proper doses??
Who are you, my physician?

it was called Eerie Indiana not Weird NJ

Actual songs, man. I've had some great times listening to actual songs.