I dunno, I think the Neilsen's are tracking me. There'e been a suspicious looking van fallowing me for the past 15 minutes. No matter how fast I go, even 50 mph over the limit, it's sticking right on my tail. It's distracting, especially with those flashing colored lights and that annoying loud siren sound. I must be…

You want to include cable? I got yer cable, right here.

And well dressed.

Brilliant!

No, no, don't be mislead by the crushing silence. You did just fine…

That was mean. Now say you're sorry.

That was mean. Now say you're sorry.

Most people who checked off "Dads" thought it referred to the show that they actually watched and enjoyed, 1987's My Two Dads.

Obviously, you're not one of those greedy people who eats more than one meal a day.

Water? Fire?! Lucky!

"Must Peep Everyday"

Well, that's just wrong.

I'm 41, I make about 65k, and I'll be waiting with baited breath for the January return of Archer. I also enjoy programs about the Universe which relentlessly remind me of just what a negligible, insignificant, worthless speck of dust I truly am. In a very curious way both shows are very reassuring,

It has become the exact sort of slop that it used to shit all over so grandly.

So, the Honeymooners was only watched by Bus Drivers and Sewer rats.

OK, fair enough. They took sloppy, illegible notes, but in their defense they were distracted by the big shiny, sparkly pile of gold bars stacked up in the middle of the room.

Ah Susie, I often think fondly of her churlish giggle, her easy way with a kind word, her adorable habit of never showing her face.

You've got something on your chin.

Your comment was funny. It was a real petrol.

There's an implied contract with the audience: The show will depict callous, selfish, treacherous behavior but we must always view it beneath a larger, perhaps mythical umbrella of unconditional love. It's a classic sitcom ploy but at least MF is often conscious of the absurd, impossible example it sets. The show…