Who doesn't like to shoot old people in the face? It's the one thing he's done that I admire.

That's not a claim, it's a fact. I saw him do it in an early film, back when the hedgehog was not quite as, um, "prosperous" as he is today. I was awed.

If I could animate a wizard, I probably wouldn't sell phones for a living.

Yep, Sportscenter still has sports, just like MTV still has videos. "Greatest highlight of all time?" NFL mock drafts? "Coors Light Six Pack?" "Budweiser Hot Seat?" Fuck Sportscenter, watch ESPN News if you want highlights. But watch ESPN for PTI. Tony is the shit. Fucking Disney ruins everything.

Donna was awful.

Lois in a landslide. Her B&D outfit, "That's why I went back to men," her stint as a drugged-out model, her shoplifting vice, not to mention that thing she does every Thursday for Peter. Plus she's got filthy rich parents.

Ice Cube.

I had Chemistry with Ashton Kutcher. He was all like, "Dude , let me hold your book," or "What did you get for question 3?" But the ladies loved him. He's what they call "Man Pretty."

Well, LaVar is a pretty cool name.

But it's the best of both worlds, cause fake reds can tan … and they won't steal your soul.

I just saw that guy. He mows my lawn. I let him drink from the hose.

Mr. Bush, please turn Dungeon into a smoldering crater of freedom.

Look at the big brain on Heche!

I thought that a poofter was a homo.

Wow,a common experience! My first time with weed didn't work either. Maybe it was all the coke … or maybe the bourbon.

Actually I think the gang rape would have the opposite effect you speak of, ZMF.

"He's from the deep North."

Otto: "Hey, remember when I dropped my keys and you thought the phone was ringing?"

Look,I said I was sorry. With these fucking cargo khakis I always forget which pocket has my cash in it. Wasn't it funny though, when I put my lighter and stash on the counter by mistake?

He is after all bearing the greatest burden for this war, to paraphrase Mr. Cheney.