I do.

No no no, Crazy Gibberish. That up there was the original, you can tell which is which by mousing over the names and then looking at the link on the bottom of your browser.

Simultaneously become the Pied Piper to mongoloid assholes who find the same cloying non-sequitor [sic] repeated ad nauseam to be "adorable"!

Tell the same joke repeatedly until people get annoyed and start mocking you! Relish the adoration of idiots brainwashed by 4-chan into thinking that being annoying enough to draw attention to yourself is some sort of victory!

Hey, welcome friend!

I'm so glad to know that I have fans now! Here I was worried that idiocy and poor taste were in such short supply in the world that I was all alone!

I'm so very, very lonely! Please say something to me, anything! Tell me that by comparison my bit makes Talky Toasty appear rich and inventive!

Due to my disfigurement and overpowering stench, I have never been touched by another human, excluding my mother and the delivering physician at the time of my birth!

If anybody asked me why I am posting in character as a gerbil, I'd just say "I'm doing a little experiment to see how the AvClub will react".