Even when I try to offer genuine sympathy I come off as fake. I'm a big fat phony!

The joke was actually on the kind of dummy who takes an unregistered cab, doesn't pay attention to what they're getting into, and is subsequently not sharp enough to profile their assailant based on anything but "white" or "other".

A malevolent manager… that sucks hard. I don't know how I could even come into the office each morning.

Same here, if you mean January 2010. I wouldn't say the will to live gets quickly crushed, more that it becomes methodically ground into finer and finer powder. Sometimes it briefly reconstitutes itself until it remembers that it's only clumpy powder. With any luck, the memory of any other kind of existence dissipates…

I think they did a study a while back saying that bronze medal winners were more satisfied with their performance (on aggregate) than silver medal winners. The former just squeaked onto the medal stand when they could've easily come away with nothing, while the latter is forced to question why they couldn't have done…

MaroonZone never gets enough love: rapid-fire 45 yard field goals and pooch punts. Fair catch!

One of the best parts of Hunger Games 2. He made a character that only felt sketched out in the books coalesce for me, and I was really looking forward to seeing him in the final two movies. I feel like I'm Horvath-ing this mourning process, but maybe the only relationship I have with actors/musicians is with their…

Saw This is 40. Moment-to-moment it's funny stuff, not always laugh-out-loud but sometimes yes. Megan Fox is surprisingly a natural fit for the Apatow world given how primed I was to dislike her.

A few of the entries are catch-alls (like #4 and #16) for returning TV shows from last year - some of whom go on to have their own entries, adding a layer of redundancy.

It was a good entry; I applaud whoever wrote it. Puppies behave very poorly and they turn into dogs.

You're just an errand boy.. sent by the grocer to collect a bill

Ed was separating from his wife when he kissed Julia; wouldn't you kiss your female text buddy if they came over to your house while you were packing your boxes for the bachelor palace?

*bwoop BWOOP* [five joints fall out of Kristina's coat pocket]

Surprised that Community wasn't an option for the year's worst TV show. (I only mean that as an indictment of season 4, not the body of work prior to it.)

- In the Governor's mind, Hershel was more of Rick's "people" than Michonne was, so killing him would piss off Rick more.
- Michonne understandably thought it was more satisfying to let the Governor die slowly, either from the wound or from walkers.
- If Rick agreed to leave the prison, there's nothing stopping the…

I consider him 1-2 after factoring in the very first attack when he took out the mustachioed prisoner with a sniper rifle and broke down the fence before driving off.

I think the Governor's followers had some dubious reasoning powers going into that whole fight, but I can see how they might have been expertly manipulated. Yes, they didn't really know this new guy, but they knew Martinez who tacitly vouched for him and was offed before he could get into his whole backstory. In…

It's usually for esoteric music licensing reasons. I had to torrent the whole episode just to get to the last sketch of the night, the one they won't put on Hulu.

I had my Blue expectations built up by Cannes then moderated again by some slightly negative and cynical press it was getting, so I came into the movie with a good attitude. After seeing it, I can now get behind Spielberg and the jury's reasoning for giving out the collaborative Palme to the actresses. The film…

Burn After Reading: Fargo-lite, which I mean in mostly a good way. It took me a while, but I've warmed up to the Coens' recurring theme of lawbreakers misjudging their circumstances. I usually prefer crime movies where a master plan is slowly revealed to the awed viewer - which is why I hated Fargo on first viewing,…