My startup sound was Homer Simpson saying, "'To start press any key.' Where the 'any' key?"

"But Daaaaaaad!"

"But Daaaaaaad!"

I said, "OOOOH, Red Snapper!" to my wife the other day…then had to spend 5 minutes explaining its significance.

I said, "OOOOH, Red Snapper!" to my wife the other day…then had to spend 5 minutes explaining its significance.

This falls just a hair shy of "Eminem hospitalized, fat" and "Paula Dean hit in face by ham" territory, but it's damn close.

This falls just a hair shy of "Eminem hospitalized, fat" and "Paula Dean hit in face by ham" territory, but it's damn close.

"An airbag won't save your life this time, buddy."

"An airbag won't save your life this time, buddy."

Anybody remember that guy(s) who used to do "TOOL >>>>>> everything"?

Anybody remember that guy(s) who used to do "TOOL >>>>>> everything"?

The Hunt for Red October was a documentary, and the events were filmed in real time.

The Hunt for Red October was a documentary, and the events were filmed in real time.

One of the serious highlights of my young childhood was when my father, an auto engineer and huge fan of the show, called up Car Talk to offer some unsolicited advice on some technical issue and producers from the show called him back. My childhood mind has remembered this as him talking with Tom & Ray live on the…

One of the serious highlights of my young childhood was when my father, an auto engineer and huge fan of the show, called up Car Talk to offer some unsolicited advice on some technical issue and producers from the show called him back. My childhood mind has remembered this as him talking with Tom & Ray live on the…

I'd say "sputtering to an end" in the headline, except that I'm pretty sure that's exactly how Click & Clack will phrase it on this week's show.

I'd say "sputtering to an end" in the headline, except that I'm pretty sure that's exactly how Click & Clack will phrase it on this week's show.

I fully intend to register my feelings about all this with Complaint Department operator Xavier Breath!

I fully intend to register my feelings about all this with Complaint Department operator Xavier Breath!

if you know what I mean…