NOOOOOOOOOOOO!

There isn't enough room for that much awesome in the schedule, unfortunately.

[Opens curtains to the outside world for the first time in months, squints into the sunlight]

We're gonna live forever!

I agree that there are way too many movies/books/tv shows/etc that take place in either LA or NYC, and as a Chicagoan I'm always going to want Chicago to be better represented in the media, but at this point, I'd really love to see writers making more use of cities that get no representation at all, like Tacoma,…

BITCHES

If the pube is visible but goes unacknowledged, we're in business, but at least one of the disembowelings has to be just be generic red mush instead of actual identifiable organs.  And don't even think about showing the camera any dicks (boobs are ok).

@avclub-4caf6aa0375b2499ebfe7e971b36eee3:disqus At least they probably had all their teeth.

MPAA guidelines clearly state that movies are allowed to have either five decapitations, or one mention of pubes, but you can't have both.

They're owning fake MCs!  And then they're going to own me, too!  OH MY GOOOOOOOO-

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Any time Lizzy Caplan is at the center of a New Girl episode, it turns out pretty solid.  She isn't a central enough character to solve every one of the show's problems, but she certainly clears up most of what's awful about Nick (namely, that he gets to have a realistic relationship instead of being the frowny guy…

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Unless he had a hard-on-nay when it was being made, I wouldn't worry about it.

I just watched this with my 17 year old cousin, and now I hear sirens.  It's gonna be cool, though, right?  I mean it's probably just a coincidence, right?  Guys?

We're ready to upgrade her status all the way to "passable in moderate doses!"

My username still works as a 30 Rock reference, but yeah, I've actually thought the same thing more than a couple of times.  I really need to come up with a vulgar pun of a celebrity's name, but so far I haven't had the flash of inspiration that brought the username Jean Luc Prickhard into existence.

Speaking as a grad student, conversations with grad students are like 40 minute long kicks to the dick.