"So maybe it was ABC that wasn’t ready to watch a ne’er-do-well raise children instead of hell." Umm, what?

George Lucas Explanation: Blah, blah, blah, Obi-Wan force-ghost gave him a hair-care tutorial, Jedi holycron, blah, blah. Real life explanation: "Of COURSE we're not doing that, it'd be fucking stupid and the more we can pretend the Prequels don't exist, the better.

They have to cover up that stupid Padewan rat-tail thing that George Lucas thought was a GREAT idea.

Well, it's not the real Comiskey, they tore that down. It's a completely new stadium built in '91 they just called Comiskey until they sold the naming rights to a phone company in the early '00s. I just call it "Cell Phone Field".

Look, I don't fault the guy, he's a politician from Vermont. Of course he protects his constituents (including gun shops). But it's absurd to hold him up as this vaulted pure version of ethics when the only difference is what he's been allowed to do in his seat. If he'd come out for gun control 15 years ago, he'd have…

So, by your logic, Bernie's taking of NRA money for the last 20 years necessarily means that he's in the pocket of the NRA and would never, ever, pass gun control legislation, correct? He's given a ton of speeches on how gun control is a "state issue". So, is that his actual belief, or is he being a politician from…

What? Do you need a lesson in English Comprehension? Are you drunk? What is it that you don't understand? I spelled out that Hillary's a flawed but still excellent candidate, and my reasonings behind that decision. What don't you understand?

Yeah, it's a standard campaign tactic, and yeah, sometimes it's silly, sometimes it isn't. And yeah, falling for it is naive, but come on, even if people don't fall for it it affects the narrative and, like it or not, it affects how people see the candidate. Take the Swift Boat bullshit. Even Dems who supported Kerry…

His crushing guilt over Randy Quaid's supposed-death was oddly affecting, which made it uniquely hilarious.

Deep blue Illinois did it with Mark Kirk, but he's gone this year.

What's amazing is the first time you see him, you think: "Yup, that's the role that guy was born to play. He's going to be doing variations on this schtick 'till the day he dies." It doesn't matter which role you saw him in, it just fits so perfectly that you can't imagine him doing something else.

And who can forget his epic make-out scene with Missi Pyle . . . including slimy tentacles. His little eye-roll was hysterical, cue Guy:
"OOHH! That ain't right!"

Also known as "The Mariah Carey of actors."

Wasn't that the gag of the role, that it was a non-Asian guy playing an Asian guy in the TV show, (hence, his vaguely-offensive-but-hilarious "Asian-Face". http://www.wearysloth.com/G… ) I figured "Fred Kwan" was a stage name he adopted, rather than them just forgetting to rename the character something more…

Oh, sweet Christ . . . that's right. Thanks turtleemily, for reminding me of that awful, awful song. I worked at Blockbuster when that movie came out on video, and our trailer reel played that fucking thing constantly.

Beat me to it.

And now you made me think about listening to Tom Hanks and Dan Akroyd rap at the end of "Dragnet".

You can always just imagine that music stagnates in about 150 years and after that people just recycle a couple hundred years of music fads over and over again. Which is why by the time TNG rolls around everybody listens exclusively to classical and Klingon opera, except for Riker who plays jazz . . . poorly. It also…

The song was THE worst thing about the show, so if you can just grit your teeth and get through it, things improve. It's not nearly as bad as its detractors make it out to be, the cast is game and likable, and though some early dialogue is painfully on-the-nose in terms of characterization, the idea for the broad…

I always heard it as one of those painful Middle School Mixer songs where you awkwardly dance with a girl a foot taller than you and just rigidly rock back and forth like a weeble-wobble.