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Think of America as a house. The Greatest Generation paid off the mortgage and cleaned up the neighborhood. The Boomers inherited the house, and, to celebrate the "accomplishment" of becoming homeowners, threw a 40-year-long coke-fueled rager. To get more coke they took out another mortgage, because what can go…

The fact they did not name the hot fudge after Cleveland represents real progress in the Family Guy universe.

I think it's gotten to the point where being the real mayor your actual city is less complicated than playing SimCity.

I think it's gotten to the point where being the real mayor your actual city is less complicated than playing SimCity.

"Let's get tomato soup delivered!"

"Let's get tomato soup delivered!"

Bioshock is really a game of atmosphere. Stripped down to its elements, its typical, but entertaining, FPS. I also felt really smart when I picked up on all the Randian satire, but that was just gravy. I actually hope Infinite doesn't tinker with the elements too much, but gives a brand new setting and philosophy…

Bioshock is really a game of atmosphere. Stripped down to its elements, its typical, but entertaining, FPS. I also felt really smart when I picked up on all the Randian satire, but that was just gravy. I actually hope Infinite doesn't tinker with the elements too much, but gives a brand new setting and philosophy…

I want her to replace Siri SO BAD.

I want her to replace Siri SO BAD.

I thought the biggest failing of Bioshock 2 was its refusal to be different from the original in any real way, but it was still pretty good. I just hope Infinite can inspire the same fear and dread that Rapture did, but with sunshine and fluffy clouds.

I thought the biggest failing of Bioshock 2 was its refusal to be different from the original in any real way, but it was still pretty good. I just hope Infinite can inspire the same fear and dread that Rapture did, but with sunshine and fluffy clouds.

The computer voice in the Pacific Rim preview is the voice of GLaDOS. It made me very excited but then very sensitive about my weight.

The computer voice in the Pacific Rim preview is the voice of GLaDOS. It made me very excited but then very sensitive about my weight.

Honey Boo Boo gets points for fueling "The Soup".

Honey Boo Boo gets points for fueling "The Soup".

The Phillies got Terrence Howard in 2008. The two have taken similar trajectories since then.

The Phillies got Terrence Howard in 2008. The two have taken similar trajectories since then.

There's a club in Philly called "Helium", because I guess someone forgot what laughing gas was actually made of.