This article's premise is a pretty thin thread to hang 1500 words on.  But I guess it means Kyle gets paid for the afternoon spent typing random crap into IMDB's search box.

Resorting to "State Songs" is cheating.

Yeah, but none of it is rock 'n' roll.  Even the Elvis stuff is Sinatra-style traditional pop.

"Oregon Trial"

Yeah, I'm afraid you're gonna be stuck with "Gangnam Style".  Probably forever.

Yeah, Tom Petty counts as Californian.  "Free Fallin'" and "Into the Great Wide Open" are two of the most iconic LA songs ever.

"the highest ratio of people per largest city versus rest of state"

I guess we can count that.  The actual TV theme song is more big-band than surf rock though.  It ain't rock 'n' roll if you have more than one brass instrument.

As a "decent rock song about Hawaii", I'll allow it.  It's got too much of a tourist's point-of-view to work as a state song tho.

Yeah, in the streets of Chicago and the town of New Haven.  I suppose there's also a bloody red sun in fantastic LA, but it's not real specific.

As for my original home state, has anyone ever written a decent rock song about Hawaii?

What the hell does Peace Frog have to do with California?

WHAT.  Much as I love TMBG, there ain't no way two Brooklyn hipsters are going to take credit for Massachusetts' official song.

My standard Monkees rant: why do we assume that musicians create every bit of their performance themselves, and get upset when we find out that they had help, or think they're "cashing in"?  We don't have the same expectation for other pop art forms.  Nobody thinks Jon Hamm does the lighting and costumes for Mad Men…

So, superintelligent world-eating AI capable of interstellar travel, able to build slaughter droids and clone soldiers by the thousands, but it's never heard of a geosynchronous relay satellite?

Successful city problems.

My wife's afraid of heights, so we're probably the only tourists to ever visit Toronto without going up the CN tower.

This is how you do Hatesong.

"Now me functioning / like an executive"

I hate this song because of the goddamn mandatory audience participation.  Whenever I hear it (more than once at a wedding, for God's sake) everyone's expected to act it out with their date.  Fuck that.