It's true. My humour is vanishingly scarce where this movie is concerned.

Vampirism as a protracted metaphor for peer pressure - there's literally a scene where all his friends jump off a bridge, and then he has to too.

And…this is the first time you've heard them referred to as such?

Fun to type, and fun to say.

Holy shit, MEATGIF got an answer!

Wasn't this planet infested with poisonous green snakes?

Everybody says that, but having seen The Rock recently…it has a charismatic cast but it's mostly amusing as a now-unthinkable bit of pre-9/11 absurdity (the marines' plan is just…what?!?), moreso than as a lonely good Bay movie.

Watch where you spit.

That is almost enough to get me to watch some of this show again. I lost interest about…I dunno, half way through. Caught the occasional episode. Never really saw anything that made me want to get back on board, beyond JR's obvious sex appeal.

Dating a dominatrix: highly recommended. 

Jesus midget-tossing Christ there are a lot of guys here clutching their tender red bottoms over the notion that Saruman might be, in 2013, the role Christopher Lee is most known for. 

I'd see a human centipede movie that's set in a utopian future where everybody's in one human centipede or another. Everything is made to accommodate human centipedes. Everybody gets around in bicycles made for human centipedes.

Million likes.

I love Green Lantern, but I could do without ever reading that goddamn oath ever again.

Haven't read any in 20+ years…I imagine the Xanth books probably hold up terribly. What I mostly remember is a lot of creaky puns and you know how authors in this genre tend to write sex like their moms are looking over their shoulders? True here, but there seemed like a lot more terrible, giggly, PG-rated sex than…

Stealing from the ol' Xanth series: the power to make a pink spot appear on a wall.

Uh, the Moya crew on Farscape, obviously.

I always thought it was Corpsegrinder Neck!

Wasn't bad. This is the go-to series for crazy vehicular mayhem, and it's been delivering of late.

With Hawkwind, the question isn't, where do you start.