Amateur. As everyone knows, and was documented on Onion News Network, the only smart wish is for eleventy billion more wishes.

It was Beggar's Canyon, actually.

Yeah, the targeting display in Vader's cutting-edge TIE Advanced x1 looks if anything even less usable and impressive than the ones in the Incom T-65's.

You can't really spoil something that's already dead and rotting.

I loved the parts of that movie that weren't about superheroes or Doom.

Local Man Inordinately Proud of Giant Flippers In Place of Arms; Frightens Area Schoolchildren

It was the same logic (and makeup) as Lea Thompson in Back to the Future.

Wait, I thought Diana was still born magically from a clay figurine. Do Amazons gestate babies nowadays?

Well he is The Sovereign.

That's the best news I've heard about this show in a year. I thought Shahi was going to take family leave for a few years when she left.

And we're full circle to Benedict Cumberbatch once again.

The Patriot II: The Patriotening

Come on, all those restaurants are just throwing those pelts away. At least she's found a use for them.

They're coarse and irritating and they get everywhere. Or was that the Klingon description of tribbles?

I wouldn't even mind Showtime, because I pay for that already. I don't know what CBS All-Access is and I won't respond to it.

There were auditions for General Hux? I figured the producers just yelled out the windows at Shepperton Studios and hired whoever screamed back the loudest.

Finally, it's Jai Courtney's time to shine!

We're not talking about interstellar travel though. If I recall correctly, Rey and Finn had just left Jakku behind, and the hyperdrive wasn't working yet to jump anywhere, so they were still in-system when Han and Chewie tractored them aboard.

That's pretty adorable.

No, Luke went into seclusion sometime after Ben Solo (and what looks like a few other Dark Side adepts) slaughtered all his students except for Rey. According to the chronology, that occurred about 15 years ago, when Ben was around 14-15 and Rey was 5. We don't know if the First Order had even emerged at that time,…