"Here at Itchy and Scratchy Land, we're just as concerned about violence as you are. That's why we're always careful to show the consequences of deadly mayhem so that we may educate as well as horrify."
"When do you show the consequences?  On TV that mouse pulled out that cat's lungs and played them like a bagpipe, but…

She's an evil queen who solves crime in her spare time!

Doo do, doo-doo-doo doo-dooo, doo do, doo-doo-doo doo-dooo!

MAGNITUDE NEEDS 'PHRASES

It's perfect for soup!

Moira knows the squealers when she sees them.

I'll admit it: Watching Ed Helms sob uncontrollably will be the high point of my Valentine's Day.

Don't you worry. Ollie will deal with the car in private.

So when did Padalecki start living in a tanning booth? Because that tan is becoming more and more distracting each week.

CONAN O'BRIEN WINS BIGGEST LOTTERY JACKPOT EVER
TV funnyman announces intention to buy out Comcast

CRAP-DAMMIT

CRAP-DAMMIT

1600 Penn goes to one of those gradeless, structureless, new-age feel-gooderies.

1600 Penn goes to one of those gradeless, structureless, new-age feel-gooderies.

You think the guy in the $4000 suit can't finance a Broadway play? COME ON!

He means Mitch Pileggi.

"Coming next week to SyFy, watch as we strain the premise of this network with the new reality series "Taxidermy Nation!" Watch dead animals return to pseudo-life and the drama surrounding the Bisbee, Arizona taxidermy outpost! It's "Taxidermy Nation," only on SyFy every other hour!"

Carafes of sangria.

CRAP-DAMMIT.

Is it? Is it harsh barley?