No.

Remember the days when Depp would have made a great ethnically ambiguous Tonto?

Fifth.

She's obviously very seriously broken, and in need of fixing. Enter the Extreme Makeover crew … I mean Caroline.

This is interesting, because I see the exact opposite: a judgmental, prissy, pushy bitch being helped out way more than she deserves by a girl with her defenses up but a good head on her shoulders. I guess it depends on who you identify more with. Eat the rich, is my motto.