I think of Amelie as Persephone, daughter of Zeus and Demter, and Queen of the Underworld. And the rest of these marginally talented hacks would burst into flame if they so much as stood in the shadow of her laptop.

Ann Coulter. Most unintentionally hilarious pod person ever. Even more so than Nancy Grace.

Did you learn to double post from Paul Reiser as well?

If The Hater is going to sample Yeats…
…where's the shout out to Arnold's "Dover Beach?"

If you bring to mind that Seinfeld ran for nine years, then nine years can seem like an eternity.

Yeah, Quirk. They floated "The Frugal Really Creepy Assraping Pedophiliac Gourmet" past the focus groups and, well, it just kind of fell to the floor and died.

OK. Please give me the book, chapter, and verse wherein the Buddha obtained Nirvana by lighting up.

My thoughts exactly, Indiana. A sustained bit of good ole'fashion pillaging and plundering would probably "raise the tone a bit" in 'Bama. They might actually crawl out of 3rd World status and have to give all that federal money back.

We all have plenty of imaginary friends, Phel. Don't you?

It's not really Zen if you get there by smoking pot.

@MelissaW: is that darkly tinted picture supposed to convey your mood, or did you just F up?

@BsB: now that our local PBS affiliate is broadcasting MI5 [nobody gets to say "shit," though], I sort of feel like the threshold for British assclownery has been raised quite a bit, at least until the whole cycle has run at least twice.

Thesis: The obscene gobs of cash this shitburger is going to make will repudiate Riff's assertion. Discuss. Be sure to substantiate your position with discrete and contingent examples taken from the corpus of pop culture itself. Any submissions over eight paragraphs will be scrutinized most exactingly.

Hey, Frito! There's an amazing new development called "proof reading." You "proof read" something to see if it contains any mistakes in spelling or errors in punctuation. Just thought I'd pass that on.

My restaurants went tits up ages ago…
…so thanks for nothing, celebrity chef of Indian descent. Wouldn't've mattered even if I'd won. The Kenny Rogeres celebrity doublewide's gotten a little bit too, well, creepy to enterain folks that ain't on medication.

A line between what and what, Uniform Romeo? I've simply got to know!! Because, if it were up to me, everyone who's ever been on this show or associated with it in any way, shape, or form, would be beaten to death like a seal pup.

I've got a better idea. Have Prison Wine jerk off between Heidi's fake tits-but only after he's removed them with a carving knife.

^This'll probably get deleted.

I think it's going to take a lot more than a Nick Gage auto de fe to rescusitate Shamalamadingdong's talent, there, Wyatt.

Potato Pater Familias. Dumbass.