IT WAS THE JAPANESE, JON. YOU WERE JUST TELLING US ABOUT THE PACIFIC THEATER. RIVETING STUFF. BUT THEN YOU KNOCKED OUT. DROOL DOWN THE FACE. WE THOUGH YOU'D BETTER JUST SLEEP IT OFF.

COULDN'T BE MORE WRONG NECKBEARD! IT'S GREAT STUFF! REALLY MOVING! I'M SORRY YOU COULD NEVER GET INTO IT! I HATE TO SAY IT'S YOUR LOSS BUT I CAN'T RECOMMEND THE STUFF ENOUGH! TAKE SOME TIME OUT OF YOUR DAY, FIND A LITTLE PLACE OUTSIDE, READ SOME POETRY AND SEE WHERE IT TAKES YOU! LET THE WORDS BE YOUR SAILBOAT INTO…

COLE HERE! SOMEONE GET ME GARY X ON THE HORN! I THINK WE HAVE OURSELVES A COMMIE NOMINATION! GREAT STUFF, SEAN! REAL TOP SHELF WORK!

HEY JERODAST! COLE HERE! JUST WANTED TO LET YA KNOW THAT WE SURE WOULD LOVE TO RETURN TO TWIN PEAKS! WHY EVER SINCE COOP DRAGGED ME OUT THERE SO MANY YEARS AGO, I'VE BEEN COMPARING IT TO EVERYWHERE SINCE. LIKE MANDAREE, NORTH DAKOTA! WAS THERE JUST LAST WEEK! STILL HOME TO SOME TRIBES OF NATIVE AMERICANS AND LET ME…

HEY JERODAST! COLE HERE! JUST WANTED TO LET YA KNOW THAT WE SURE WOULD LOVE TO RETURN TO TWIN PEAKS! WHY EVER SINCE COOP DRAGGED ME OUT THERE SO MANY YEARS AGO, I'VE BEEN COMPARING IT TO EVERYWHERE SINCE. LIKE MANDAREE, NORTH DAKOTA! WAS THERE JUST LAST WEEK! STILL HOME TO SOME TRIBES OF NATIVE AMERICANS AND LET ME…

I'D ALSO LIKE TO THROW IN A GREAT, SMILING SALUTATION TO THE RETURN OF THIS FEATURE! TASH, IT'S ALWAYS BEEN ONE OF MY FAVORITES! REALLY ENJOY THE INSIGHTS AND COMMENTS YOU BRING TO THE TABLE! REAL SWELL STUFF! I SURE DO LOVE WHEN YOU GUYS GET TO WRITE STUFF IN LONG FORM AND STRETCH THOSE MUSCLES! I MEAN, THAT TODD…

HEY DAVE, IT'S COLE! GORDON COLE! JUST WANTED TO SAY IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE TRYING REAL HARD, ALL THE BOYS HERE AT THE BUREAU ARE BIG FANS AND APPRECIATE WHAT YOU'RE DOING! THE THING IS, WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO ASK YOU TO DIAL IT BACK! REEL IT IN! LIKE ONE OF THOSE BIG FISHES ALBERT CAUGHT OFF THE POSSUM KINGDOM LAKE LAST…

WELL BOYS, I'D LOVE TO GIVE A REAL OPINION BUT THE HOME OFFICE HAS HAD ME ALL OVER THE GREAT WEST RECENTLY! REMINDS ME! IF YOU EVER FIND YOURSELF IN BOZEMAN, MONTANA, I RECOMMEND STOPPING OFF FOR A QUICK BITE AT THE STORM CASTLE CAFE! FELLAS, YOU CAN'T PASS THIS ONE UP! THE COFFEE IS DAMN FINE, THE PIE'S FROM HEAVEN,…

I SUBMIT FOR THE AV CLUB'S APPROVAL, SEAN IS JUST BOBBY ALL GROWN UP! TRUTH COMES OUT!

I SAY KEEP IT AWAY FROM BAY!

MUST BE A REAL SHAME TO NOT GET IT THEN! KEEP THE CHIN UP! IT'LL COME!

THANKS A MILLION!

YOU WOULD THINK THEY'D FINE INDIVIDUALS FOR PAYING TO SEE THE HANGOVER 2! REAL WASTE OF TIME! JUST AWFUL STUFF! ED HELMS SEEMS SWELL THOUGH!

THANKS, NEWT AND EVERYONE ELSE! REALLY APPRECIATE IT! STAND UP FANS HERE AT THE AV CLUB! THE BUREAU'S GOT ME HEADING TO KADOKA, SOUTH DAKOTA AND I'LL BE NEEDING SOMETHING TO READ ON THE DRIVE! BEEN MEANING TO LOOK INTO COMICS! LITTLE FRIGHTENED! BUT IT SOUNDS A BIT THAT I CAN JUST JUMP RIGHT IN! FEEL IT OUT! AGAIN,…

GOTTA QUESTION FOR THE PROS! HOW ON EARTH ARE THERE MULTIPLE COMICS PER SUPERHERO? NEVER GOT THIS! SEEMS CONFUSING! DO THEY TAKE PLACE AT DIFFERENT TIMES? ARE THEY ONE CONTINUOUS STORY? DIFFERENT UNIVERSES? NEVER SURE HOW THERE'S FIVE VERSIONS OF BATMAN OR SUPES OR EVEN SPIDEY RUNNING AROUND! SPINS THE HEAD INTO KNOTS!

ON THE UPSIDE, MAYBE THIS WILL GET THOSE DEADWOOD MOVIES MADE! REAL SHAME ABOUT THAT SHOW! STILL TELL EVERYONE I KNOW TO WATCH IT! FEEL ALONE IN MY LOVE HERE AT THE BUREAU THOUGH!

WELL, MIRROR, I'M NOT SO SURE THERE WAS A LIFE BEFORE DAWN! HOW YOU THINK PEOPLE GOT AROUND WITHOUT THE SUN? LITTLE SILLY IF YOU ASK ME! PROBABLY WHY YOU CAN'T REMEMBER IT! DIDN'T HAPPEN!

YOU KNOW, IT DEPENDS ON HOW YOU STILL FELT ABOUT THE SERIES! FOR SOME, IT WAS WORTH IT JUST TO GET A LITTLE CLOSURE! OTHERS DIDN'T WANT TO SEE IT HEAD THAT WAY AT ALL! IT WAS CLEAR THE SHOW DROPPED SOMEWHERE IN THE MIDDLE OF ITS RUN! REAL SHAME! WISH IT COULD'VE BEEN DIFFERENT! BUT YOU MAKE WHAT YOU CAN AND YOU MAKE…

IF ONLY, HIP! IT WAS A SIMPLER TIME! COULD GET ALMOST ANYTHING ON THE TUBE! SAY, THIS ARTICLE'S GOT THE OLD WHEELHOUSE SPINNING!

DARN SHAME YA THINK SO, BISH! I THINK WE CAN ALL AGREE IT WAS A REAL ROUGH SPOT! A RAINY DAY! BUT YOU GOTTA ADMIT THAT ANDY AND DICK HAVE CHEMISTRY! REAL HOOT TOGETHER! JAMES IS MORE YOUR WET BLANKET TYPE! THINKS HE'S GOT IT ALL GOING ON WHEN REALLY THE LIGHTS JUST BARELY FLICKERING! EVEN I CAN ADMIT THAT! DON'T GET…