The man with the golden eyeball!

Ah, yes, the spoken-word Grammies — won by such diverse figures as Carl Sandburg, Henry Rollins, and every Democratic President since Carter.

Because of the way they tabulate multiple-disc sales, I'd only have to sell 3 copies of my 1000-CD set, "Talkin' 'bout the Dictionary with Cameleopard." Billboard charts, here I come!

We're going to see an R-rated movie — it's called Winter's Bone!

How dare you say that about Kojak?

She Maced Me (It Felt Like a Kiss)
Congratulations to the happy couple.

(Phel and Prison Wine walk out)

Justified
So is John Hawkes going to turn up as a guest star on the next season of Justified? I mean, it's inevitable, right?

Every time I see a vaguely recognizable actor with a giant nose, I think it's John Hawkes. And hey, a lot of the time I'm right!

The only acceptable way to watch The A-Team
is on a UHF station, 18 inches from the TV screen, in the summer between 6th and 7th grade.

Dickety! Highly dubious!

Those chocolate-covered Peeps remind me of the oil-covered pelicans on the news.

You know, I went into Shutter Island convinced that I knew the twist ending. And I was about 75% right, but the actual twist diverged from my expectations enough that it was still surprising.

Holy shit, Franz Nicolay joined Against Me!? How the fuck am I just learning this?

They all adore Robert Smith. They think he's a righteous dude.

I had heard that the last shot of Cache was important, but thought that meant the last shot before the credits started rolling. I was so baffled that I missed the shot that I should have been paying attention to.

Crusher v. Pulaski
Huh, I had completely forgotten that they explained where Dr. Crusher was during this season. I also have no memory of Pulaski being introduced onto the show; when I was first watching the series in syndication, she just showed up out of nowhere, leaving me confused and angry.

"While I doubt a pro-abortion episode would have played well in the 80s"

Yeah, "Where Silence Has Lease" really stuck with me, too. The idea of Picard, chilling in his quarters during the self-destruct sequence, made me ask myself what I would do if I had only 20 minutes to live. Heavy stuff for a 10-year-old to process.

Good one, Bad Horse.