I hope he hurries up and meets the kids' mother.

How can he ask for help when he only has an row of stitches for a mouth?  No wonder his depression has gone on for 10(!?!) issues.

You know how people in non-english speaking countries learn to sing along to English pop-songs based on the phonetics?  That's what will.i.am is to Wyclef Jean, and I don't even like Wyclef all that much.

They're not going to bounce up the stairs unless you do.

I could barely hear her over him trying to hold in a huge shit or whatever his "role" was.

Can't he just play a drunken rural cop?  I'd see that all day long.

::Tapes "I LOVE COCK" to Michael Nagle's door and knocks::

"Car full of midgets!" still gets a laugh out of me.

"Dominic the Donkey" for Italy.

You didn't warn us about the bird-like shrieking, Harris.  That's the most disturbing part of all.

I hope he does it without costume, so theatre-goers have to consult their Playbill to remind themselves what the fuck they're actually seeing.

The giant female wrestler?

It's been a while since she has.  It's really starting to pile up.

I'm uninterested in Trauma Mom ruining one of my favorite characters.

Jimmy died the way he lived.

OMG WHERE'S CARL I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM IN THREE WEEKS BUT NOW THAT SOMETHING IS ON FIRE I NEED TO SEE HIM RIGHT NOW YOU KILLED SHANE BUT I DECIDED JUST NOW THAT I LOVED HIM MORE AND THIS IS PROBABLY HIS BABY OMG NO

I approve.

I watched her take her arms from around him, her hands off his hips, pull herself into a standing fetal position, and I thought, "This bitch pulls the worst likeable reaction to anything."

The best thing to happen to Greendale since Luis Guzman.

I read "Brock Samson" in a "Mototov Cocktease" voice.