sigh
Dear Eugene,
You are funny. Makes me wish I had an interesting question to ask, but I don't, so I'll just say keep up the good work.

Well, Mikey, maybe I've been wrong all this time (admittedly, my experience with Lithgow is limited to that awful 3rd Rock show and the Kevin Bacon super-dancing-fun-time movie). I'm actually open to changing my mind, if you give me some movie titles to check out.

I showed up a day late, but I feel the need to share that my boyfriend and I saw Lisa Lampanelli in New York about 7 years ago, before she started getting famous. She did the exact same tired-ass shtick she does now.

Whoops, should've read further down before I said basically the exact same thing.

I actually thought this film DID star Amy Adams when I saw the ads. I can't be the only person who cares so little that she gets them mixed up. Too bad for Ms. Adams. Or maybe for Ms. Fisher, I don't know.

You forgot 5. Drag out the forced suspense as long as possible? Check.

I hated the affected nasal whining of the singer (don't know his name), especially when it became obvious that he was forcing the youthful sneer because he was too damn old to hit that register without a lot of effort. It reminded me of Dustin Diamond on Saved by the Bell forcing his voice to crack because he was…

I must say, there was some quality hatin' in this post. I thought I was reading some of Amelie's work for a second there.

Oh man. Mine would start with a Caesar salad. A GOOD one, homemade with the best ingredients and real, cut-no-corners Caesar dressing. Then, pork loin roast cooked in red wine-garlic sauce. With homemade chunky mashed potatoes on the side, with Parmesan cheese mixed in. And to finish, a really simple New York style…

789, that story is both creepy and fascinating. Did you keep the card?

Santino?! How far the self-proclaimed mighty have fallen.

I have never understood the appeal of getting cut flowers. They die in a couple of days and it just feels like a waste. Now, I've gotten live plants in pots before, which I think is awesome.

I first loved him because of To Kill a Mockingbird, I'll admit. But he was a good dude in real life too. A real gentleman and quite progressive for his time.

Sorry, endub. No offense intended.

Are you sure it wasn't just a regular dude who pretended to be retarded so he could get away with giving titty massages to strangers?

Yep, you pretty much laid it out there. Except you left off how self-congratulatory the douchebag is. He laughs so hard at all his own "jokes" that he doesn't need an audience.

Or Quebecoise. But I think she is from New Orleans.

And times are only gonna get tougher, so look out for the resurgence of Gallagher as a hot property.

Looove Dmitri. I too am eagerly awaiting his show.

Sorry they're not up to your exacting standards, Tux. I happen to think "Brown sugar, how come you taste so bad?" is pretty damn funny. But there's no accounting for taste, I guess.