Maybe Mandark's parents were just big Johnny Cash fans?

Oh good, so all we have to worry about is the potential negative effect of the stress and emotional turmoil of a prolonged adolescence! No sweat!

Maybe the city government is run like Mr. Smiley's understaffed amusement park, with Mayor Dewey doing everything himself.

Close enough!

Is that the greatest punchline in superhero history?

They'd better! That kid is seriously overpowered, especially for a fourteen-year-old. Super strength, pseudo-flight, controlling plants, healing, shapeshifting, interspecies fusion, bubbling, energy shields, and telepathic possession? If he ever went bad (or if he swapped minds with someone malicious) he'd be goddamn…

Embarrassing confession: I turned this one off halfway through. As soon as Steven showed up at Sadie's house I knew exactly how it was going to go, and I really didn't want to see it happen. I know, I'm a wuss, but I hate body-swapping stories that aren't episodes of Justice League Unlimited. Something about them, the…

Steven actually one-upped him in horrifying eldritch beast powers for once.

Wait wait wait, "It Came From Beneath The Sink!" is in there? She has a DVD of an episode of Goosebumps?

I read the first issue of this, but didn't stay with it. I'm tired of stories about the world's deadliest assassins, and would prefer a story about the world's least deadly assassins. That would be more fun.

I too would like to register my approval of this particular absurd story in this comic book about a cranky anthropomorphic duck navigating a superhero universe.

And now the story of the French Revolution, told in real time!

They're not going to need to change much for the inevitable porn parody.

What is it with Tom Hardy and films involving grandiose villains with cumbersome breathing apparatus?

I believe you're some manner of nerd, sir. It's a very manageable condition.

Amusingly, not the first article to be filed thusly.

Can't a reptilian shed his skin in privacy anymore?

I'VE LITERALLY ATTEMPTED GENOCIDE ON THEM THRICE OVER, I DON'T KNOW WHAT MORE I CAN DO, MOM!

Well, I can always use some extra sheets…

Yeah, it's a struggle. You move with your right hand and act with your left, and that alone took a lot of practice. I don't see myself improving beyond "hilariously oafish" any time soon.