But I love New Order.

That sounds like a nightmare to navigate if you're dating an 18-20 year-old who would like to have sex. These should be national laws to make it more obvious when it's legal.

Ancient Aliens: found!

But do they have farty, boner corpses?

Who's talking about moving to Canada? Ecuador, Costa Rica, Chile, Red China. Canada's too damn cold for me.

Would 20 be jailbait or a 20-year-old's sexts be child porn? Yikes.

Sounds more like Pokémon River's Edge to me.

No

I held the door for him.

Daddy issues.

Internet porn in mom's basement.

Everybody has their favorite, he was great too.

Yeah, the guilt factor was a lot higher with Hustler than Playboy. It's all very quaint compared to the hardcore shit kids are watching on tube sites now.

I used to steal my sisters' Victoria's Secret catalogs from the mailbox.

Fappers gotta fap, yo.

Porn user = sex offender in your mind? Because there are alotta porn addicts. The Venn diagram would not exactly be balanced.

It's spelled "butt." I kid, I kid. She must be a saint, because that looks even worse than my last job.

"Size may not matter, but I'm packing…"

Hey, I like beer and hate Trump.

Wait, you masturbated to Elle? Were you Amish? I was looking at Hustler on the reg before I hit 12.