Barry Badrinath: I'm just lookin' for a little slap n' pickle.

SHS: Today, the President got a letter from a famous Internet celebrity! It simply asks the question: I Can Has Cheezburger?

Occam's Razor - she is Mike Huckabee's daughter

"Here's some money, go buy a Smashmouth."

Someone has finally leaked a picture of Superman with a mustache!

♫ Ooh wah…

Vic Romano: Up first for the World Team is Tim Babwe, he's a sprinter from Ghana who now delivers flyers for a struggling yard maintenance company.

*Jim Gaffigan does 45-minute routine on Hot Pockets/Hot Pie*

♫ …and its 1,2,3 what are we fightin' for?
don't ask me I got diarrhea the next stop is North Korea,
and its 5,6,7 open up the pearly gates. Well there ain't no time to wonder why…WHOOPEE we're all gonna die… ♫

He shouldn't be so hard on the president…
at least that guy knows where you can get a piss-stained sheet…

Hang in there Trent… we're in this together

Uhhhhh, OK Computer?
featuring tracks that were deleted from the Radiohead album including "The Karma Police ran over my Dogma", and the Dominos Pizza inspired track "Avoid the Noid Android"

[pushes up glasses, steps up to the lectern]

*Lip Art Garfunkel & Lip Art Buchwald join lawsuit*

The joke's on you… they're going at night!

In Soviet Russia, Coke Zero Polonium-210's you!

Coke Zero is really just OK Soda, in a goth can…

It's like gellato-ian only with a "stapo"

He finally looks like the "Old Salt In Fishing Village" that he pretended to be, oh, so many years ago…

When you let a moron get THIS CLOSE to being Vice President, and possibly, with an old man as President, get THIS CLOSE to being President, it just paves the way for another moron to actually work his/her way into the office. She didn't need a further political career after her run - she was the grindstone that wore…