Where's Bruce?

Oooof. Lord. Why did that happen. WHY WHY WHY?!

I didn't see "Holy Grail" until sophomore year of college.

Liked, because the username made it look like the alternative to looking inside my heart.

Hey-o!

Tragedy at the local sperm bank today; 20 men died cramming themselves through the door, all shouting "FIRSTIES." More on this story, at 11.

Yes, good idea, @Drinking_with_Skeletons:disqus! Let's all go down to the sperm bank and see where the AVC members end up in the rankings.

I hate it too.

This makes absolute sense. Even his face looks like the thumping drum breakdown.

@15c53e0ca17632ac96e0b2ab92b4f5dd:disqus: Not only was that wise, but if you count the syllables, it's also a haiku.

Thanks for inviting me to your Super Bowl Party, guys! I made a giant bucket of Cram-In-Your-Gaping-Maw Nachos with extra Donkey Sauce! I AM THE ROYAL AMBASSADOR OF FLAVORTOWN!

The one where "Death Wish 3" is used to broker peace deals between Israel and Palestine.

BOOM!

She should learn to play guitar and lead his house band.

I was going to go with "oooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooo, yo!"

Fuck no.

Just got to rattle off the first season jitters, if you ask me.

HE WAS SO STONED.

Is there a tumblr of black people reacting to David Blaine tricks yet?

Due to the inclement weather, TI will be held inside today.