Gravity plays a key supporting role in making the pig's blood fall on Carrie.

The Human Ton would recommend reading a book instead.

The baseball is a lie! Where's my new episode of Sleepy Hollow, Fox?

Joe Lo Trujillo will "celebrate" on a futon in couch position.

Jonah Rex

True story that happened to someone else: A friend of a friend who teaches English and creative writing at a California state university was asked by a girl in his class, "If all the stuff the soldiers carried bugged them so much, why didn't they just put all that down?"

So, an entire planet populated by James Carvilles?

… and the Republican Party as a marauding band of velociraptors.

Blair Underwood and his superfluous wheelchair are available to play Marlowe.

We know you'd just run that off-brand Tom Hanks' Dungeons & Dragons made-for-TV movie every Sunday night instead of NFL games, @avclub-3db41011acc2d229176bf6a92202728d:disqus .

As if Harvey Weinstein ddn't have a big enough god complex to begin with, you go and give him a comment like that to glom onto?

I'll sometimes watch Elementary and a segment or two of 60 Minutes. But yeah, for me, CBS might as well be OWN.

Now that's he's off the cocaine, Robin Williams isn't even manic anymore. He's subdued while continuing to be unfunny. At least no one is in danger of getting hurt.

I prefer bangers and mash, hold the stewed tomatoes.

It's a less gritty reboot of the first-run syndication one-season wonder Cleopatra 2525.

Ibis we could do an Amon Ra job with Egypt puns.

No way I'm voting for Bozo and the Pineapple.*

If that board member really wants to dis Biggie, she should propose naming the westside corner of the intersection Tupac Drive.

So, Carrie is a period piece?

Having an agreed-upon definition of anarchism is far too orderly for a real anarchist.