That Sample Song
Wow, that song does nothing for me. Sounds like something Vonage would use in a commerical to eat away at my brain tissue.

See also "Rolling Kansas" - just turn on Comedy Central and wait 15 minutes.

Wait, what stinks like an armpit, your socks or your college roommate's ferret?

He didn't call you dude, brah.

The Article Mentioned R.E.M. So this isn't off-topic
Anyone else read the R.E.M. piece from this month's Spin?

That train kept a-rollin', but I forgot until when.

What ISN'T better than CNN? The only thing I can think of is local news, which doesn't even count as, well, anything any more.

Actually, Saginaw, MI, is the new Flint, MI.

I am dismayed to see them resorting to mug shot collections. The first handful of collections, which featured mug shots that were all related by a theme, always came as a welcome surprise. Lately they've just been posting pics of hot girls, and people with facial tattoos or weird hair, or even just "witty" t-shirts.…

Illegal aliens?

Winner: Jerky Yankee Fan.

Every 7-11 and their ilk will have a stash of the cans. Upon receipt of your can, you must submit to a permanent tattoo-ing of a Dr. Pepper logo of your choice on your forearm and/or forehead.

Banks
I initially thought "Banks" referred to Lloyd Banks.

Anyone else turned on right now?

I refer all interested parties to that Onion classic, "Housewife Charged In Sex-For-Security Scam."

Reading that makes me feel like I've had a stroke.

Who gets/gives oral sex should be determined by who pays for dinner, or the mortgage.