Time stands still… once per week.

Ask your doctor if Vartox™ is right for you.

Well hellooo there little miss sugarpockets!

S.N.U.H.

Today I learned that M. Night Shyamalan wrote the screenplay for Stuart Little.

Fetty Wap sounds like the name of a Star Wars character

That's nothing — once when I was in college I mixed myself a White Russian using vodka, Folger's Crystals, and Similac.

Oh, it gets even weirder:
http://www.nytimes.com/2015…

Donald Trump is very popular in Israel.

It was hot… in Burbank… today.

I stopped reading at "Twitter responds to…"

I can't think of a more versatile recipe than polenta. For breakfast and dinner.

And all this time I thought E.T. was Mr. T's son!

Welcome to the cultural base pipe!

I'm surprised they didn't mention "Big Log" by Robert Plant.

I remember this movie, but it was called Guilty by Suspicion and it had Robert DeNiro and that guy from Cheers

Michael Bolton is an airedale terrier.

There's a blue steak and a pitcher of martinis with my name on it.

I said ah-I-ah-I-I-I-I-ah-I… want the knife

2. Whenever George Lopez is not on screen, all the other characters should be asking "Where's George Lopez?"