Ha! I got married there in August this year, no elvis though. We did the garden chapel at night so we could go straight from the chapel and out on the strip.

We did Cupid’s Chapel. Also Vegas Elvis. The minister who did our ceremony told us later that he was a reformed pimp. He was a truly lovely fellow and gave us a memorable ceremony. Mazel Tov on your fifteen years!

Me too! Where was yours?

I’M AT HAPPY HOUR BECAUSE TODAY FUCKING SUCKED.

Remember Zumba hooker? She was fun too. The good ol’ days.

The Duck of Justice is my hero. I live in Bangor, and an officer came to do a “how to deescalate a situation” talk at my work. He brought the duck let us all hold it.

Because Maine.

It’s been kinda slow since the crying baby/pancake scandal of ‘15.

Yes, it’s weird but not trying to be weird.

In Maine, weird is a whole state thing.

Haha I watched this go down on Facebook live yesterday.

Yes, it’s ok to me. Being the product of an unplanned pregnancy is not inherently negative and it doesn’t mean your parents don’t love you.

i wouldnt pass the physical, so black guys it is.

My son turned 27 last week. He has a streak of gray hair right down the front center of his forehead and a little back. It’s started a couple of years ago. I haven’t had a single one yet.

My story doesn’t involve a doctor but along the same lines of having something go missing in my vagina. I was hanging out with my gal pals and I went to change my tampon. I can’t totally blame getting high on this, but I forgot to take out the old one before shoving in a new tampon. My period ended and my discharge…

You can get dead people’s nipples too.

My 20 week ultrasound with my first daughter the doc is all “Do you want to know the sex? Yes? Let’s see...is it a hot dog or a hamburger? Looks like a hamburger! It’s a girl!”

Probably my oral surgeon explaining where and how they would get the material to back-fill my jaw once they took out my fucked-up tooth and all the material around it.

I’ve got a few in the front, at my part, but when I really notice is when I go to put my hair up and I pull back the sides and realize everything above my ears is gray. I’m oddly fascinated by it because I have a round baby face so that’s my most “visible” sign of aging.

I have two on my head, which are recent acquisitions (I’m 41). The downstairs has been alight for quite some time now, which I find to be a very disconcerting turn of events. I always thought it would be the other way ‘round but apparently God wants to shine a light on my basement.