I look French in high school and college. It didn’t take :-/ I didn't have a chance to use it all that much.

Holy shit; look at your post and fix it. This is ridiculous.

He was too beautiful for this world.

I almost scored with one down in Florida last year, but it swam away at the last second. Such a manatease.

I’d jump out of a plane on top of a shark with a vest of TNT strapped to my chest into an active volcano.

I tell everyone I'm eighty-seven. If it's good enough for Aragorn, it's good enough for me.

No, they probably aren't. But it's possible.

That sort of thing is known as douchebagamy.

Did it ever occur to these dumbasses that Bill and Hillary are polyamorous? Monogamy isn't the only way to go, after all.

Jesus.

I don't know how much exploding will be going on after all those vasectomies...

Careful, you’ll get yourself grayed like I did. They don’t take criticism well. The merger has made them petty as well as incompetent.

As long as your last name isn't Trainor, it's all good :-)

There's only one name for this couple: Goloom.

Yeah, that was definitely yacht the way to go, at all.

I love Alfred’s shocked slow wave. Perfect.

Better than a Shar Pei...

Okay, now I'm lost.

“Reince, how do you feel about Trump winning the nom?”

Thus begins the Editorial Age of Bricken.