Probably because he's an alien.

Looks like French Vanilla ice cream.

The giant cyst on a dude's back is worse. There's this video (which I won't post here) of a guy with this huge cyst on his back. They extract a disgusting amount of pus from that thing, and you can hear people retching from the smell. The video always amuses me.

That gif is perfect.

If his balls are so big, why are his shorts so tight?

Alternate headlines:

I think that would just be an opportunity to make a rule of no gift cards.

This situation is exactly why at our family gift exchange (on my mother's side) there is an explicit rule that all presents should be around 40 dollars. Not less, not more. Each adult wanting to participate gives a gift to get one. We do something similar with my siblings and their significant others, but it's…

I love socks because mine go missing/disappear/get worn out frequently. My parents gave me socks and towels this year, along with the pictured knife block (because I'm a huge nerd).

That's... similar to something I would send (when I was actively on one of those sites), but that's actually how I talk. I'm not really sure what's bad about that one.

I have recently fallen in love with this cover of Silent Running leading into Breaking Out by The Protomen.

Absolutely one of the best motivators.

CLEARLY Obama has crowned himself QUEEN of AMERICA and will rule until his death! OBAMACARE DEATH PANELS will be the law of the land and AMERICA will be under the thumb of a SECRET MUSLIM!

Well, UPS doesn't have a lot of success in my experience. I had to actually start having everything delivered to my parent's house where someone would be home to receive the packages (and even then they keep getting delivered in ones or twos when I have a 14 box order) when they kept fucking up delivering to my…

Virgina?

Both the young actors look like the No-Name brand versions of famous actors.

http://kitchenette.jezebel.com/the-strangest-… See Story 4.

It's pretty much always going to happen anyway, your comments are spot-on and insightful.

No, but it is the best scarf I've ever had.

It is true that I have a rather magnificent beard.