“Bet that’d fly about as good as a dead penguin.” Well, if you pitch it hard enough....

One news network comes very close.

They’ll be doing unspeakable things, and yet they will be spoken, bigly. Sometimes doubly.

You are not alone. I have lost whole days to Jezebel’s doomstream. Sleep debt is mounting to the point that I wish I could declare sleep bankruptcy.

Trump’s going to look for the fake voters the same way that OJ went looking for the real killer.

Don’t feel sad that this is petty. Be mad that we have been so effectively swindled out of true representation on such a broad scale that this is the the level at which we must register our anger and disgust. And honestly the level of disrespect shown us in the most basic things demands a nasty petty response.

This topic won’t die because it’s the job of the press and the electorate to call out bullshit and hold our leaders to standards of moral, ethical, legal, and frankly Presidential behavior.

The time for “this is just a bill” is over. The GOP is doing penetration testing of our liberties with the intention of exploiting any vulnerabilities to seize control and lock us out of our own system.

The fine for jaywalking should neither depend on why you did it nor how much it cost to catch you.

Support the ACLU!

If a person doesn’t become a non-person with the first failed heartbeat, it seems reasonable that a non-person might not become a person with the first successful heartbeat.

Worth it for that asshole.

Do they think we won’t come for them?

EARLY. Leaves office early. Sorry, thought it would be inferred.

You’re free to move on at any time, but I want Trump to be a scathing punchline forever. And when he’s dead, we’ll wrap him in copper wire and magnets and generate electricity from him spinning in his grave.

Just promise you’ll keep making them even if he leaves office.

I think it’s important to stop waiting for reason to kick in among GOP voters.

The Tea Party’s “no compromise” strategy did the opposite of getting shit done — and that’s what they wanted, to stop progress.

He’s minimizing. His point is: “It’s not like a large number of people are legitimately (!) angry about the same issue. In fact, it’s not even like a large number of people are angry about any issue; they just want to be angry, and they brought their friends and relatives and hired professional protesters to conflate…

Mr. Giuliani: fuck you, you evil fuck.