“I have a book coming out...”

As a Cowboys fan, this checks out.

My guess is that this version is probably closer to the truth:

I assume Jake Gyllenhaal is busy?

That’s all very nice except:

I’m on “Bombshell” overload with this regime. I just don’t think it’s going to amount to anything. I feel like Trump could come out and outright admit that he and Putin worked together to fix the election, provide tapes, have signed letters, and smile and walk away. The press would clutch their pearls, shout…

The only way I’m watching an all star game is if it’s cross sport. I want to see basketball players playing hockey, football players playing baseball, hockey players playing chess, etc.

This whole story was so blatantly ridiculous that I was surprised it wasn’t an email forward from my mother

“It’s just hard to believe the dog was nasty when she took Lamby to every green room with her when Girls was still a thing 4 years ago.”

I’M A GOOD BOY I’M A GOOD BOY I’M A GOOD BOY
I’M A GOOD BOY I’M A VERY GOOD BOY I’M A GOOD BOY

Liberal garbage written by establishment elites.

Johnson: [gets knocked out cold]

What an amazing woman. I’m crushing hard right now. I hope she has a full recovery and is honoured as the hero she is.

Like hating gays before you kid becomes one.

Top GOP Congressman refers to himself as “David Duke without the baggage.”

whatever. She still won the popular slope.

Does this mean we finally get some more gun control, now? Boy, I hope so.

Thank god they’ve got excellent health care!

They are talking about him looking unhappy and miserable here. Which. That’s how he looks.

When was the last time the children of our president were off limits? I’m CLEARLY not advocating being horrible to a child, but the obama girls were called monkeys for 8 years, and im pretty sure Chelsea was CRUCIFIED for existing. So you’ll have to excuse me for not caring that this post, and most of the…