I didn’t know I wanted it until this moment, but now it must happen.

It’s like going to see a Broadway musical and telling someone, “You know that’s scripted, right? Like they’re not really doing that live, right?” (and I live in the arts before someone shits a brick) Of course the fans know that, but they’re not necessarily there to see the outcome - they’re there to see how they do…

I grew up in a Midwestern suburb...and you couldn’t pay me to live in or near Green Bay: it’s a frozen tundra of fat bigots, shitty beer, and sub-par schooling. Truly, it is the best place in the league to raise a family [that will soon grow to resent you and flee given half a chance].

So...are you BonMorte’s new burner, or YMD adopting a dumbed-down affect returning from the grave to troll after letting the ruckus die down? It’s so hard to keep up with y’all.

The huorns aren’t necessarily ‘evil’ per se - none of the tree folk abide by what’s considered good or evil by humans/elves/dwarves, as they don’t consider themselves to be a part of the world of men. As compared to the Ents, though, the huorns lived in the deepest, darkest parts of the forest and tended not to…

Ahh, I remember the halcyon days when Gawker Media had a guy who wrote weather analysis...and rather than move him to a different umbrella they fired him, and in an effort to save money and capitalize on the popularity of his subblog, have other people with no meteorology experience write about it instead...

My thought is: if she’s so disgusted by the lack of diversity, surely she would have boycotted the Oscars last year as well? But then I remembered that her husband wasn’t nominated for anything last year, and my cynical heart grew three sizes...

Mmm, Tito’s...so smooth and dangerous and delightful and affordable...

Oh lawd, now that song’s going to be stuck in my head on my drive home...I foresee an epic karaoke session in my near future.

Ha, thanks! Editing was what I wanted to go into after graduating college (with an English degree, natch) but quickly realized that a.) I like being paid, and b.) I know literally no one in the industry who could facilitate letter a.

Not to be that person, but correction for the title:

“Who’d you bring home tonight,” he screams as the other ball pops out.

Same!

Just plain ol’ Carmex does it for me. I prefer it in the tube as opposed to the little pot, but it’s always done the trick for when my lips get super chapped in subzero winter.

Original Carmex (though I get it in the squeeze tube and not the tub anymore, just due to my messiness) is my shit. It works so well - and if my lips are in dire straits due to the frigid cold, a coating of Vaseline and then Carmex does the trick. It’s also 99 cents a tube.

Oh, and upon further reflection I am also a compulsive zit and ingrown hair picker too. I am physically unable to just leave it alone - it has to be resolved, even though I know that it will look worse, and leave me more susceptible to further ingrown hairs. Doesn’t matter, can’t leave it.

Ohhh yes same, though I usually pick more often than bite. I was midway through absentmindedly picking at them when I opened this article...and continued to do so all the way through it, but consciously :/

Same, but I pick obsessively at my cuticles/nail beds. I was actually in the middle of a pretty solid session right when I clicked on this article (slow day at work)...which made me really self-conscious about it, as I continued doing so anyway. Ahhh maybe one day I’ll cut this shit out, as soon as I have no boredom,…

It’s hard to tell whether he’s doing to intentionally sabotage his campaign (I know, that’s giving him a lot of credit in the savvy department), or if he’s normally this much of a sad sack and we’re only getting to this layer due to prolonged exposure.

“I prefer to roundly ignore reality and construct my own masturbatory fantasy world” is the foundation upon which the Republican candidates have constructed their platforms, so somehow her profound lack of accountability or ability to accept facts doesn’t surprise me.