get the hell away from me with those pickle cookies old man.

and it’s not even a good one.

Can any adult justify a $600 toy purchase ever?

No, but living with a functional, unharmed face is.

A

this is why women live longer than men.

It’s effing john delaney, what did you expect

hahahahahahahahahahahahah...*deep breath* hahahahahahahahahahah... kid rock. oh god.

And who’d guess that president wet dog smell could read or write at all?

To be fair, what sensible baby would want trump to touch them.

Yeah, you know what, if you hate all kinds of supremacy, why don’t you and your asshole vp get the fuck out of the white house, and while you’re at it, give up your billions in ill gotten gains.

*long, drawn-out laughter* .... Papa Johns. *More long, drawn-out laughter*

God, Marnie is kind of hot. :x 

Swedish fish are good if you’re working overnight and you need to stay awake.

You know what? The chuds who are threatening these people? walk ‘em off a cliff. No, seriously, do it, because they won’t benefit society in any way. 

seven patties? jesus christ, no wonder we have a weight problem in this country.

my question is, what mcdonalds sells strawberry sundaes?